


How Deep is your Love?

by Kalandan



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boxing, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Military, Boys Kissing, Eventual Romance, I Don't Even Know, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Minor Character Death, Slow Build, Swearing, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, Tumblr Prompt, mako is the glue that keeps chuck and raleigh together, possible threesome if you squint at this hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-13
Updated: 2017-09-06
Packaged: 2018-05-01 06:21:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 28,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5195432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalandan/pseuds/Kalandan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chuck has eyes for the handsome blonde in his elective class.  Turns out Raleigh is a lot of fun to hang out with, and a good study partner.  But can they be more than just study buddies? Do they have what it takes?  Inspired by a tumblr prompt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. How Deep Is Your Love?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [the7thmauser](https://archiveofourown.org/users/the7thmauser/gifts).



> This was inspired by a tumblr romance prompt ask box meme. Spicysiren asked for "doomed kiss" and chaleigh, and normally I don't ship them in canon so I put them in this AU to find something that would work. I also found out that romance to me is always a slow build, that is why this turned into this longer. I really hope people like it and please please please give some feedback, let me know what you think did and didn't work (as I also don't normally write romantic stuff) so if it sucks let me know
> 
> Headcanon blurb for this: City College/University of Engineering mostly.  
> Chuck is 20 yrs old, Sophmore in College  
> Raleigh is 25 yrs old, Junior in College (ROTC/ active duty)  
> Yancy is a Graduate Student Part time, Working full time, Lives with Raleigh and Tendo. Tendo and Yancy are an established relationship in this.  
> Herman is younger than in the movie, and is kind of a spitfire graduate student full time. Friends with Chuck.  
> Mako is in some of Chuck's classes.  
> The Kaidanovskys run a boxing gym, Named Cherno Alpha. (I stuffed as much as I could into here)

Chuck can’t believe this is happening.  Sure Chuck had spent about half the class trying to see what Raleigh was doing on his phone during class, but he didn’t expect to get this kind of attention.  Professor Pentecost of their Psychology class giving Chuck a pointed look before asking him to see him after class.  That sobered him up, paying attention to his text and teacher for the rest of the class. Only sparing Raleigh a few additional glances.

“Mr. Hansen, is the class not captivating enough for you?”

“I’m sorry sir, What?”

“I noticed your pointed lack of focus on the material. Apparently your fellow student is far more interesting than cognitive development?”

Chuck almost drops his jaw, he’d heard you don’t mess around with Prof. Pentecost, but this is a whole level he didn’t anticipate. “uh,” Cough cough, “No Professor, I am sorry sir, it won’t happen again.” The best Chucks reeling mind can come up with for an excuse.

“I’m sure it won’t.” Pentecost pauses, giving him the once over look, “Besides I’m sure talking to Mr Becket would be a far more effective way of communicating.” Pentecost smiles at the young man in front of him, Chuck’s eyes practically bugging out of his head. “If you pay attention in class you might learn a thing or two about communication skills and how best to interact with your peers.” Pentecost breaks out into a full smirk, “We’ll see you on Thursday for class. Thank you Mr Hansen.”

Pentecost leaves the classroom without another word. Chuck still standing there awestruck at his Professor’s words.  Blinking rapidly to clear his mind he grabs his backpack up and slowly walks out, still at a loss for words.

It takes him a week to get the courage to even try and speak to his classmate. “Hey, Becket is it?”

Raleigh turns around “Raleigh Becket,” He sticks his hand out to Chuck, “Sorry I don’t remember your name.”

“Its Chuck, Chuck Hansen. I was wondering Raleigh, if you’d like to get together some time after class....” he pauses in releasing the handshake, “to review notes and stuff.”

“Ah, um sure.  That would be great, that would help a lot. Staring at paper doesn’t seem to help prepare for these tests” Raleigh smiles, and Chuck inhales quickly, he knew he was handsome, but charming too? Oh no, Chuck was in trouble.

Recovering quickly he shakes his head, “Ah, great. You available after this class? We can go to the library or cafeteria.”

“ah, sorry Hansen, I’ve got another class right after this, Um,” he turns and looks at his notebook, “How about dinner time tonight? Everyone’s got to eat at some point.” Raleigh is all easy charm and nonchalance at the same time.  Chucks chest constricts with a longing to get closer to this man.  He’s like a ray of sunshine and Chuck has been sitting in the dark for too long, he wants to soak up every drop of the light Raleigh is giving off. Chuck smiles brightly.

“Yeah, dinner tonight sounds good.” He exhales slowly, calming his rapidly beating heart.

“Okay cool. Meet up at the cafe? Or you got a place in mind Hansen?”

Snapping back to reality, he realizes he’s been asked a question, “Call me Chuck. How about we meet up at the caf and I can walk you to this amazing little cafe not far from campus? Its worth the trip.”

“Hmmm, is it expensive?”

“Nah! Its dirt cheap, actually cheaper than eating on campus, way better coffee too.”

“Okay, sounds like a Plan.” Just then the Professor walked in and drew Raleigh’s attention away from Chuck.  Chuck was a bit disappointed, but he realized he was in school to learn, not to ogle at handsome men.

He quickly scrawled his number on the edge of his notebook and tore it off.  When class came to an end he caught Raleigh before he could leave the classroom. “Raleigh,” no response, “Oi, Becket,” That got his attention.

“Huh oh sorry bout that. What’s up?”

Shoving the little scrap of paper into Raleigh’s hands Chuck blurts out “Here, my number in case you can’t find me.” He looks away quick to cover the blush on his cheeks.

“Ah thanks. I’ll catch you then.”

Chuck deflated a little, no ‘here’s my number’, or ‘let me call you now’ or anything. Just the paper shoved into his pocket and then he’s gone.  

 

Chuck paces in front of the caf doors. He checks his phone for the umpteenth time since he arrived 7 minutes ago.  He would have called or texted, but he doesn’t have Raleigh’s number.  Chuck readjusts the strap to his backpack, when he feels a tap on his shoulder. Spinning around he comes really close to the person, looking up slightly Chuck realizes its Raleigh.

“Been waiting long?” Raleigh asks, smiling that warm genuine look of his.  Chuck swears the guy is doing it to see if he’ll squirm.  

Clearing his throat he croaks out, “Oh, uh no, not long… but I couldn’t text you or anything.”

Raleigh, the adorable jerk that he is, (Yes Chuck has begun to call him that in his head, making note not to say it outloud) Tilts his head, quirking his eyebrow. Then a look of surprise crosses his face before he facepalms.

“Dah! My bad Hansen, I forgot to give you my number. I forget these normal things all the time.” He pulls his cell phone out from his back pocket and hits a few buttons.

Chuck looks down at his own phone when an unknown number pops up on the screen. Raleigh continues, “That’s my number, incase you want to message me next time.” He smirks, puts his phone back in his pocket before half bowing to Chuck, “Please sir, lead on.” Chuck can only smile in response.  

“Follow me then, coffee and studying await!”  

The tension Chuck originally felt trying to talk to Raleigh fades quickly with the casual smiles and warm bubbling laughter.  They talk and joke on their way to the cafe.  

They grab a couple of comfortable chairs with a low table between them in the corner of the cafe.  “What would you like? First drink is on me.” Chuck boldly states, his spirits much improved from the walk and the phone number he acquired.

“What’s good?”

“Honestly, everything.  What is your vice? Lattes, coffee, they even sell a variety of teas and they make really good espresso too.” Chuck beams a little, feeling much more in his element.

“Hmm,” Raleigh bites his lower lip for a moment as he pulls his text books from his bag. “Do they make matcha?”

“Oh a green tea fan, yeah they have that. Hot or cold?”

“Hot thanks.” He turns his attention back to his bag and notebooks.  

 

A couple of minutes later Chuck returns with two large mugs and saucers of hot beverages.  He hands Raleigh the frothy green drink and sits down with his own drink.

Inhaling deeply Raleigh closes his eyes and enjoys the tea’s aroma. “Oh this smells divine. What’d you get?”

Chuck takes a small sip, “hot chocolate.” Raleigh quirks his eyebrow up at that. “what?!” Chuck retorts.

“Oh nothing, I just pictured you as a coffee kind of person.”

“I usually am, but I’ve also got a bit of a sweet tooth. Wanna try it? This is the best drinking chocolate around.”

“Is it like the mexican drinking chocolate? or the super sweet stuff?”  Raleigh looks kind of skeptical of the mug Chuck is holding out for him to take.

“Try it and find out.” Raleigh makes a face momentarily, “I didn’t poison it or anything, I swear, now take a sip so we can get back to business!” Chuck’s temper starting to flare a little.

With an additional sideways glance at Chuck, Raleigh takes the mug, sips a tiny bit from it before handing it back. Chuck keeps looking at him, waiting for the reaction.  “Well?” His impatience getting the better of him.

Raleigh seems to be staring off into space, turning his head up sharply he stammers, “huh, uh Oh its good! really good.” Raleigh’s gaze returns to the present.

Chuck hides his smirk behind his mug, taking another sip.  “I told you it was.” But he can’t keep the smirk out of his tone.   

Raleigh raises an eyebrow at the remark, giving Chuck a glare, “so you’re modest too. good to know.” dripping with sarcasm.

Chuck almost chokes on his chocolate. Raleigh looks up from his tea with alarm written across his face.  Chuck waves one hand at him, to let him know he’s okay, while putting the cup down on the table.  He coughs a couple of times then clears his throat.  His voice slightly huskier from coughing, “I never claimed to be modest mate. That seems to be on you.” Follows the statement up with a devilish grin.  

Raleigh rolls his eyes at his companion.  Taking another sip from his matcha, he quickly changes the subject, “Have you had the Matcha here too?” Chuck shakes his head, no.  Raleigh continues “would you like to try it? since you let me taste yours, seems only fair.”

“Nah, but thanks for the offer. Maybe another time.” Chuck wants to facepalm, he was just offered to indirectly share spit with this guy and he turned it down, what is wrong with him? Turning to pull his bag out, Chuck hides his face that is starting to blush in his bag, making a production of getting his books out.  

Finally drinks and books all squared away the two get down to the reason for this outing.

 

* * *

Chuck and Raleigh make it a reoccurring study session, because they both clearly need the help.  Chuck doesn’t think to ask it until two weeks later, “DAH, psychology is not my forte! Stupid brain,” he hits his own head in mild frustration, “I can take an engine apart and put it back together but ask me about how information processing works,” pftt. He makes an exploding hand motion next to his own head, to emphasize the point.

Raleigh laughs, “Ugh, you’re not alone.  So that must make you… mechanical then.”

Chuck looks up at Raleigh across the table, “What? Huh, oh you mean my major. You’re right on.” He looks back at his notes for a second before realizing he doesn’t see Raleigh in any of his other classes. Meaning he’s either in a different year, or a different major. And judging from looks he’d guess a different year, he looks a little bit older than Chuck. Which isn’t uncommon, considering Chuck is just shy of being a child prodigy, skipped a grade in primary school and tested out of half of the required classes for freshman year.  Accelerated courses were more his speed.  Chewing his lip for a moment of indecision he forges ahead, “What about you? What’s your major?”

Raleigh smiles broadly, sitting back in his chair he doesn’t respond, but picks up his drink and sips it slowly. “wouldn’t you like to know.”

“Uh yea, that’s kinda why I asked.” Chuck considers rolling his eyes at this adorable guy, trying to out troll him, the troll king. He laughs mentally at the title he just gave himself, have to come up with something better than that.  

“Guess Hansen.”

“Okay first of all, No, I’m playing a little game. Either tell me or I’ll find out some other way.  Second of all, why do you insist on calling me by my last name? Its Chuck, C-H-U-C-K, how many times do I have to tell you that?” His temper rising at the fact he still has no idea what the guy across from him studies, he too sits back in his chair determined to win this battle of wits.

“Huh? Oh Sorry about the name, its a habit, I guess.  So used to going by surnames that I didn’t really consciously realize I was doing it. My bad, CHUCK.” He smirks back, then sits up abruptly, placing his drink aside.  Grabbing his text book and flipping the pages rapidly, he shouts “AH! I got it Chuck, the answer to #4! I knew it was right in front of our noses.”

Chuck lets the conversation drop for now.  Happy to get some of the school work done.  

 

It takes a month of snooping before he actually figures it out.  Next study session Chuck meets Raleigh at their usual table in the back.  

Raleigh has already purchased their usual drinks and is sitting comfortably in the oversized chair.  Raleigh looks up when Chuck approaches. “Hey, I got you the usual, hope that’s alright.” He doesn’t look up from the note he’s writing on a post it note. The usual being a mocha for Chuck and a nonfat matcha for Raleigh.

“Your a PHD!” Chuck claims triumphantly, as he sits down.  

Raleigh pauses in his writing to look up at his friend. His brows crinkle together, a WTF written on his features. He sits forward and puts his book down on the table, “What?”

Chuck smirks at him, “You’re a PHD, a professional Hole Digger!”

Raleigh’s jaw goes slack for a second, and Chuck starts to panic a little, did he go too far? He knows Raleigh is in civil engineering, and its one of the slanderous jokes he’s heard from other civil engineers.  And Raleigh’s lack of response wasn’t what Chuck expected.  Just when Chuck is about to stammer some kind of apology Raleigh breaks out into a great big barrel laugh. “Oh wow,” he pauses between laughing to breath, “Oh that is a good one! I love it,” still chuckling heartily he continues, “Got to tell that to Yancy, he’ll love it!”

Now Chuck panics afresh, _who the heck is Yancy?_ Is he dating this guy and Chuck had no idea? He’s certain Raleigh would have mentioned it before now.  They’ve been study buddies for half the semester, and they talk about a ton of things. Most of the time inconsequential stuff, but important info gets through, now and again. And Chuck is sure that if he was seeing someone, male or female he would have mentioned it by now, after all its part of Raleigh’s charm. He’s alarmingly honest and fairly transparent in emotional display, its all over his face.  

Chuck can’t help himself and he bites out the question, “Who’s Yancy?” Its borderline accusatory, but he doesn’t care, his chest is tight and his brain not working right.  He has a death grip on his mug, as he stares daggers into his mocha.  

Raleigh wipes a tear from his eye, and he is absolutely beaming happiness now. It makes Chuck angry at himself for not picking up on this Yancy guy before.  How could he be so wrong about this guy, sure he wasn’t even 100% sure he was gay, but in college there’s a chance he doesn’t know himself yet.  

“Huh, oh Yancy’s my brother, we share an apartment together. Thought I’d mentioned him before.”  Raleigh looks slightly confused for a second, then lights up again, beaming even brighter than before. “You would probably get along really well with him.” He squints at Chuck, trying to read him, Chuck has relaxed his grip and his brain is no longer at def con 5.  “You alright Chuck?”

“huh, oh, uh yeah. Fine thanks, just a bit of a caffeine headache is all.” he sips his mocha in hopes to sell the crappy lie.  He smiles more genuinely at Raleigh after putting his mug down, “the mocha ought to help that.  So back to business eh? What are we torturing ourselves with this week? Behavioral analysis or some other such nonsense?”  The rest of the session flys by uneventfully.  

 

Next week Raleigh texts Chuck before their session.  

=Want to meet up with me & a friend for dinner instead?=

-U buying? where at?-

=maybe, you going to behave?=

-depends on how well you feed me-

=Meet us at the corner of Alexandria and Claredon=

-when? now?-

=No at our usual time=

-fine i expect food, not just a mocha-

=don’t worry. food will happen=

Chuck ponders what he can respond with, and finally decides to let it rest.  He’s going to see him soon enough.  He checks his map on his phone to remember where Alexandria and Claredon are.  Not far he doesn’t have to run to get there from class.  That taken care of Chuck’s mind wonders, who is he going to meet? Why invite Chuck along? Chuck gives himself the once over, clean clothes, doesn’t smell, I guess I’m presentable.  Just my usual jeans, t shirt and zip up, no baseball cap today, but he doesn’t need to hide his hair, it looks good today, spiked just right.  

Well no sense in wondering or worrying, not like I have time to change before meeting them anyway, my dorm is on the opposite end of campus, unless I wanted to change. Nah I’ll deal.

 

An hour later Chuck is waiting at the previously mentioned corner, looking around trying not to look too suspicious or lost.  He has his phone in hand incase he gets another message or text. He doesn’t have to wait long, Raleigh comes up the street waving to get Chuck’s attention.  Chuck nods and heads towards his friend.  “Hey!”

“Oi, who we meeting? where we going?”

“hold your horses.  Follow me, the restaurant is around this building, the intersection is easier to find if you don’t know where you’re going.” He dodges some pedestrians and ducks into what appears to be an alleyway. “Thanks for joining me, I love my friend Tendo but he insisted I bring a friend, he’s treating.” Raleigh winks at Chuck then, and it takes all of Chuck’s willpower to keep moving and not stop dead with that adorable little wink.  Chuck is closer to 70% sure that given the chance he would jump Raleigh’s bones in a hot minute.

Returning to planet earth Chuck clears his head, “Who’s Tendo?”

“Oh you’ll meet him in just a minute.” Stopping on the sidewalk Raleigh looks Chuck straight in the eye, “ready?”

Now he’s getting nervous, wasn’t before, but then Raleigh did that. So honest and sincere it hurts. Swallowing this new anxiety down, Chuck manages to nod and follow Raleigh into the alleyway restaurant.  

Throwing his arms wide, Raleigh shouts while crossing the restaurant, “Hey Tendo, my man!” They embrace like gravity pulled them together, “How’ve you been?”

“Hey Becket boy! I’m well.  Please sit, and who have you brought along?”

Turning to Chuck, who is feeling awkward and out of place with these two being so openly friendly, Raleigh introduces the two.  “This is my friend Chuck, my study buddy from psychology.” gesturing to the man Chuck just met, “Chuck Hansen this is Tendo Choi,” bringing his hand up to his face, Raleigh shields his mouth from Tendo’s view, “the smartest and quickest communications programer you will ever meet. But don’t let him know, his ego is big enough.”

“I heard that.” Tendo deadpans.  Raleigh smiles at Tendo, and giving Chuck a sheepish grin.

Chuck’s eyes go a bit wider, “Nice to meet you Mr. Choi,” He shakes hands with him.

“Call me Tendo, we’re not being formal here.” He gestures for both of them to take a seat.

Raleigh even pulls out the chair for Chuck, before sitting next to him, both across from Tendo.

The restaurant is nice, and fairly expensive, for a college budget.  But Tendo assures them both to order whatever because he is paying. They talk and enjoy the food and ambiance of being off campus for once. Chuck takes note that Tendo really enjoys his coffee, he has one before during and even after the meal.  At the end of the meal Raleigh excuses himself for the rest room.

Chuck nods to Raleigh, and when he turns back to the table Tendo is leaning forward staring at Chuck. He is taken aback and jolts at the intense gaze focused on him.  “Hurt him and I will hunt you down, you got that?!”

“Excuse me?” Chuck too confused to comply with the demand.

“You heard me,” he nods in the direction Raleigh left, “I am practically that kids other brother I’ve been around the Becket boy’s long enough. So take this as a promise from someone close to him, you hurt him and Yancy will hunt you down. If Yancy can’t find you, I will hunt you down.  Do I make myself clear?” Then he smiles sweetly and sips his after meal coffee.  As if he’d just asked how the weather was… Chuck sat back, a bit shocked.

Chuck would normally be angry about being spoken to in such a manner, but now he is distracted by what the threat means. His confusion spoken before he can think it over “So he’s into guys?”

Tendo stops his cup mid sip and puts it back on its saucer.  “You weren’t sure?” Chuck starts to wilt with the answer, but Tendo continues “he’s bi, but if he felt comfortable enough to bring you to lunch with me then I suspect you’re more important than that clutz has lead you to believe.”  Tendo goes back to drinking his coffee, as Chuck lets all that information process. “I’m surprised you haven’t met Yancy yet, but then again he’s been busy recently.”  Tendo stares off into the corner of the room, Chuck left pondering his own standing in Raleigh’s life when the man in question returns.

“What’d I miss?”

“Oh nothing, just paying the check and chatting.” Tendo puts on a brilliant smile, that Chuck swears is rehearsed.  But Chuck just nods numbly in agreement, not trusting his voice to remain calm.  “Well Its been another lovely dinner. I’m sure you have more school work to do and I have to get back to work.” He stands up, Chuck following his action, Raleigh walks around to hug Tendo.

“Work so late?” Raleigh whines.

“Its why I get paid the big bucks, kiddo.” Tendo ruffles Raleigh’s hair before giving Chuck a firm handshake, with a pointed look. Tendo’s body language and grip saying volumes, like ‘mess up and I will hurt you’, or ‘that’s a promise not a threat.’ Chuck swallows his words and just smiles weakly back at the older man.

Raleigh and Chuck wave goodbye again at the corner, they head back towards campus and Tendo the opposite way.  

Chuck tries to play it cool, “Umm, that was some really good food. Best free food I’ve had all year.” He flashes a brilliant smile, with dimples and all.  

Raleigh smiles back, laughing a little, “thanks for joining me.  I really appreciate it.”

“Ah no problem, you need someone to eat free food, you know who to call.” Chuck animatedly points his thumb into his own chest.  He’s about to make some smart ass comment when the sound of thunder shocks both of them.  They look up at the sky, which has been overcast all day, they see the darker clouds rapidly approaching.  

“Shit.” They both shoulder their bags and break into a jog, all conversation forgotten.  

Another peal of thunder rolls over them, this time closer.  Without any cover to take shelter under the skies open a torrent of water on them.  The rain comes down hard, and fast in giant drops that sting as they make their way to the ground. They  still have another block to run to get to an accessible part of campus.  They run the whole way, getting soaked despite their best efforts.  

They stop under the awning for the campus student union.  They take a look at each other and try to find a dry spot on them. Raleigh finds one dry spot on his back under where his backpack was. Chuck has a little more dry space under his chin at the front of his shirt, he leaned forward more as he ran it seems.  Raleigh’s mood sours when he realizes he was going to study in the library but he doesn’t want to go back to the apartment and change then come all the way back.  

“Damn, so much for the library tonight.”

“Why’s that? It didn’t go anywhere” Chuck quick with a light hearted glib.

“har har,” Raleigh sneers at the bad joke, “I’m soaked. So if they don’t yell at me first I’ll just be really uncomfortable the entire time.  The air is always cranked in there, I’m going to freeze to death while trying to focus.” Raleigh wipes his hand over his face, moaning the impending doom. Then he stands up, adjusts his bag, “Well guess I’ll have to make do at home.” His face says otherwise, “Catch you later Chuck.”

But suddenly Chuck comes up with an idea since he’s loathe to see Raleigh leave.  He reaches out and grabs Raleigh’s wrist before he gets away. Raleigh turns and looks at the hand grasping his, Chuck looks at the point of contact before he realizes Raleigh’s not moving away anymore.  He lets go of him and stammers out, “Hey I’ve got an idea.” before he looks away blushing again.

“Yes?”  Raleigh not following the line of thought. Waiting for Chuck to fill in the blank.

“Oh, uh I, uh... “ suddenly shy of his own idea, he blurts out the rest before he loses his nerve, “I live on campus ya dork.” he tries to make it seem casual, throwing in a normal jibe. “If you want ya can borrow some of my stuff so at least you’ll be dry.” Raleigh perks up at this thought. His smile returns and the light in his eyes shines through.  

Raleigh pauses only momentarily, regrasping his bag on his shoulder before responding “Yeah if you don’t mind. That would really help me out. ” He give Chuck the once over, “I owe you one, if your stuff fits.” He punches Chuck in the shoulder playfully.  

“Oi, you calling me fat or something?” Chuck slides easily back into joking with him, forgetting the tension of a moment ago.  

Raleigh smirks, looking at him from the corner of his eye, “Nah, just tiny.”

Chuck’s turn to punch Raleigh, “Oi, you’ve got maybe two centimeters on me, that does not make me tiny! American moron!” He huffs at the implied accusation. Raleigh laughs, and for a second Chuck’s heart seizes up at the beautiful sound, he forces his body to keep moving and breathing.  He starts to lead Raleigh through the connected buildings of campus towards his dorm.  

“Oh so if I’m such a moron then why you getting so defensive? eh?” Raleigh is still smiling and the laugh ready to fall from his lips again.  Chuck tries not to get hung up on how much he wants to hear that again.  

Chuck mumbles, “Not defensive, just realistic, ya boob.” Now he’s walking faster in a hopes that Raleigh doesn’t catch sight of his face, blushing from collar to hair line. Raleigh keeps pace, but remains a half step back, not sure where he’s going.  

“Oh come on now, don’t be like that ya prickly koala.” Name calling a fun past time for the two of them, but this is a first he’s been called that by anyone other than his mum. He stops dead in his tracks, turning mid stride to face his name caller. Raleigh looks surprised at the sudden change in Chuck. He stops, taking a half step back.

Grinding it out cooly, Chuck stares daggers at his friend, “Don’t call me that.” Then just as quickly he turns and continues on, long strides squeaking on the hard floor of the admin building.  

Raleigh recovers and runs the few paces to catch up, his turn to mumble, “sorry Chuck, didn’t mean to offend ya.”

Chuck shakes his shoulders out, forcing a smile onto his face, before turning the corner.  Blinking a couple more times before he thinks his face will be convincing at nonchalance again, “Don’t worry bout it, just don’t… again. m’kay?”

“No problem, ya bastard coulda warned me.” He sticks his tongue out at Chuck, and the light mood is back as soon as it disappeared.  

Chuck smiles calmly again, one more turn and a flight of stairs later Chuck unlocks his door, letting Raleigh go in before him.  Raleigh looking around the place taking it all in.  

Low Whistle, “Nice digs.”

Chuck doesn’t spare the living room a second glance as he heads down the short hall to his room, “huh? Oh that’s just the common room, I don’t have it all to myself. I share that with two other guys,” He makes a dismissive movement with his hand as he unlocks his bedroom.  Raleigh still a few steps behind.  Chuck goes in leaving the door open.  

“Wait you get a living room, kitchen and private room? Damn son! You’ve got it made, how’d you score such a nice pick?”

Chuck is putting his bag down and rummaging through his closet when Raleigh finally walks into his room.  “Huh? Oh got good picks because of Herman,” he makes a gesture with his head to the room they passed, “He’s got speciality needs, so gets great picks for housing.” Chuck doesn’t elaborate on it, and Raleigh doesn’t ask anything more of this Herman fellow.

Waiting for Chuck to pick something out for Raleigh to borrow he looks around. Puts his bag down by the door, “Who’s the other guy?”

Chuck pulls his head out of his closet, panicking a little at the question. _What does he mean? Does he think I’m already with someone? Oh shit._ Then he looks at Raleigh and sees him pointing at the picture on his desk, of Chuck, his dad and his room mate.  He breathes a quiet sigh of relief.  “Oh, which one?”

“Obviously the guy you’re not related to, duh! I can figure out that dude,” points at Herc,  “is family, the way he’s got you in a headlock like that.” Raleigh smiles fondly, his gaze shifting away from the picture to another place and time.  Blinking he returns to the present, “so who is he?”

“That’s Herman, we took that picture when I moved in Freshman year.” He smiles at the memory again.  Returning himself to the task at hand, he adds, “want a t-shirt and hoodie or a long sleeve shirt Becket?” Damn, now he’s got Chuck doing that whole last names thing. “Throwing a pair of workout pants at Raleigh, he continues, “hope those will work, because all my jeans need to be washed, and even I’m not so gross as to offer stinky clothes.”

“gee thanks, so kind of you.” Raleigh grabs the pants and straightens up from leaning over the desk, “the t-shirt and hoodie would be great, if you don’t mind.”

“I mind, that’s why I ask.” His tone glib and merry, “of course I don’t mind.” Then he grabs a shirt and pulls down one of the hoodies on a hanger, handing it to Raleigh.  

Raleigh pauses, “Do you have a bag I can put my wet clothes into? I don’t want them to ruin all my notebooks.”

Chuck gestures toward the hall, “Yeah I’ll grab it after I change. Use the bathroom, it’s the only door across the hall. Oh, before I forget again”  he opens his dresser and throws a pair of socks at Raleigh’s head, which he catches deftly.

“Ah, thanks.”

Chuck quickly throws on some sweatpants and long sleeve t shirt, dashing out of his room to grab a plastic garbage bag, and returning to his room.  Raleigh comes out of the bathroom, hair still matted down and skin a bit pink.  He’s holding his wet clothes away from himself in one hand, and all the things previously living in his pockets in the other.  Chuck thinks Raleigh looks good in his clothes, maybe one day he’ll do this again, but change for a totally different reason.  Raleigh is standing there head tilted like a dog questioning him, staring when Chuck shakes his head to clear his thoughts.  “oh right! Here,” remembering the bag in his hand Chuck shoves it at the other man.  

Raleigh looks at the bag a little skeptically before the corner of his lip goes up, “I know you think my fashion is trash, but really? Isn’t this going a bit far?” He chuckles as he places his clothes in the bag and places all his other items into his backpack.  

Chuck for once is speechless. Opening and closing his mouth with no certain rebuttal.

Raleigh smiles again, “Relax man! Its a joke. Jeez when did you get so uptight?”

Anger replaces the previous confusion “Oi! I knew it was a joke! Its not my fault its so bad that I couldn’t laugh. Seriously mate, need to work on your jokes.” Chuck’s pulse returning to normal after spiking in panic.  He looks away, throwing his own wet clothes into his laundry basket.  

 

“Well thanks again. I’ll catch you later.” Raleigh waves and picks up his bag, shrugging into both shoulder straps.  

“Hey, wait up!” Chuck’s mind scrambles, focus what do you still have to get done? Logic and emotion fighting to gain the upper hand in his mind. He grabs his bag, throws in his fluid dynamics book and some additional books. “You’re going to the library right?”

Raleigh just nods, looking at Chuck, waiting for his next statement. “I’ve got some stuff to check out, so I’ll join you for a bit.”

“Ah okay” Raleigh waits in the hallway looking in on Hansen’s room.  Raleigh fills the silence, “ya know, if I lived here I’m not sure I’d ever leave campus.” He stares down the hall, then starts scuffing his shoes, watching his feet like they are super interesting.

Chuck turns his head up, watching his crush, _OMG did I just think that?!_ _,_ act like an awkward teenager.  It was rather adorable and endearing, as he continues to avoid making eye contact with Chuck.  

 

* * *

 

 

Midterms were a bear, but both Raleigh and Chuck manage to survive the trials set forth by Professor Pentecost.   The week after they find out they both passed.  Chuck is very relieved.  He’s surprised to get a text on monday night.

=Plans Thursday?=

Chuck thinks about it. Checks his calendar, realizes the school is closed that day and the next, so no classes. Wondering what is up he responds simply -Nope-

=Want to join us at a party?=

-us who?-

=My peeps, you can bring friends too=

-where at?-

=our place=

-hmm. sure-

=awesome see you then=

-address and time?-

=Oh= The text is followed by an address.

-time?-

=7pm=

Chuck makes a note in his phone’s calendar, with a growing feeling of elation he pulls out some post it notes, sticks one to the back of his phone “bring something”.

When Thursday night rolls around campus is quiet.  Chuck did half of his homework for next week last night, stayed up late, knew he wouldn’t be able to focus on it today.  He’s cleaned the suite bathroom, kitchen and re organized his room, did laundry and folded it before putting it all away.  Chuck has lost all his distractions, and therefore, his calm. His nerves have him wired, sitting in his dorm he flips through tv channels while his legs fidget. He checks his watch for the umpteenth time in the last hour.  He has checked the map almost as many times, the route memorized at this point.  

Herman comes in, he has a studio he works in most days, even those close for the holiday.  Chuck looks up at the sound of the door closing.  Newt pauses, looks at him and quirks an eyebrow.  “what's got you all worked up?”

Chuck looks back at the TV, mumbles “nothing”

“doesn't look like nothing.” But he limps his way back to his room without any more comment.  

Chuck listens for his roommates movements.  Sounds like he left his door open,  Chuck turns of the tv before getting up from the couch.  Walking back to the open doorway he leans on the frame, trying very hard to keep up a facade of calm.  “hey”

Herman doesn't hold with bull shit. As is his way he cuts to the heart of the matter “looks like you're going somewhere.” he states without preamble, “whats got you worked up?”

Chuck slumps a little more into the frame,  debating on asking for help or trying to go it alone on this.  Biting his lower lip, “what you up to tonight?”

Herman must not have anticipated that question as his eyebrows shoot up.  He recovers quickly “Come again?”

“You want to join me at a party? Off campus” Chuck looks up at Herman then, “Becket’s throwing it.”

Herman, turns in his desk chair, “Do you want me to go with you? Or you just asking because you need something?” He narrows his eyes at his friend, who is now holding his hands up in mock surrender. “For real?” he screws up his face thinking, “who throws a party on thanksgiving?”

“What?” Chuck exclaims.

Herman levels a stare at Chuck “yeah, its a holiday, or did you miss the memo? Oh right Aussie! Did you forget about it from last year?”

Chuck purses his lips as he thinks, “Oh right, I think I was busy playing the latest fallout game to realize it was a holiday… Does that mean I should do something?”

Herman facepalms. “Dude! That means its likely you slash me, have been invited to a dinner party.”

Chuck jaw drops a little bit, he recovers quick. “What should I bring? Will you come with me? I can’t show up empty handed.”  Chuck begins to panic, pacing in the door frame of Herman’s room.

“Calm down!” Chuck stops still at his words, hands clutching at his head in terror. Herman continues, “Don’t worry, I will join you, only because the caf is closed.  I have just the thing to bring to a dinner party,” he rolls to his dresser, opens the middle drawer, looks it over once then reaches in and pulls out a bottle of liquor.  “Everyone appreciates a good whiskey.” He hands the bottle over to Chuck, who holds it with reverence. “What time is this party, and where is it?”

 

They take a cab there, since Herman hates walking more than the length of campus in one go.  Herman pays for it, so no big deal, Chuck has the whiskey in his coat pocket.

Herman gives Chuck the once over before they ring the bell for the Beckets’ apartment.  They are immediately buzzed into the building, take the elevator up and find the place with very little incident.  The building, like campus and the rest of the city, are rather quiet and subdued.  Making the Beckets apartment all that easier to find when its the only one making a significant amount of noise.  

They nock, and can hear people on the other side of the door.  They wait, nothing happens, Chuck knocks louder, this time there is a pause on the other side, some shuffling is heard.  Then there is a rosy cheeked Becket, Chuck only knows its a Becket because he has a striking resemblance to Raleigh.

“Oh hey, um,” Yancy turns his head towards the rest of the apartment, “Bro! your friends are here.” turning to face Herman and Chuck again, Yancy opens the door all the way and gestures for them to enter, “Please come in.”  Chuck gets a quick glance of Yancy in a “kiss the cook” apron before he is gone.  Yancy has run back into the kitchen before the guests are even inside.  

Chuck walks in cautiously, followed by Herman, who is also wary of these unknown surroundings.  They close the door behind them, and from the unknown pops up Raleigh, rosy too, but maybe that’s just because it’s a bit warm in here.  “Oh Hey! So glad you could make it,” Raleigh steps up to them, “let me take your coats, welcome to Becket Thanksgiving!” He smiles brightly at both of them.  Chuck quickly produces the Bottle of whiskey and hands it to Raleigh, who looks surprised to receive such a thing.

“A thank you? From us.” Chuck manages to sputter before Raleigh nods, “Hey Yance!”

“Yeah?”

“They brought Whiskey!”

Yancy’s pops his head out of the kitchen, takes a look at the bottle and whistles low, “hot damn! I really is going to be a good thanksgiving! You’ll both stay to drink some of that right?”

Herman and Chuck look at each other then at Yancy before nodding in unison.  

Raleigh gets Chuck and Herman’s coats, and gives them the quick tour of the apartment, mostly a look here, turn around see most of it, open door a, open door b, and the last room is behind door number 3!  Chuck and Herman are introduced to the three other guests before Raleigh gets them set up with drinks.  “You’re not driving are you?” He asks as he’s already holding Herman’s gin and tonic and Chucks’ beer. They assure him they aren’t, then he beams another brilliant smile at Chuck, and a quick wink “had to make sure. Better safe than sorry.”

 

Raleigh is running around the small apartment like a roadrunner, getting drinks for guests, or helping Yancy in the kitchen.  He still makes time in between to chat with Chuck and the other guests.  Turns out Herman’s heard of the Beckets before, Yancy is a part time grad student in the applied mathematics department, same dept as Herman.  They spend the evening eating, drinking and talking with an array of people that seem to float in and out of the apartment.  

Chuck may be underage but that doesn’t stop him from getting served here.  Herman ends up in a heated debate with Yancy and Tendo about some mathematical algorithm and its application in computers that Chuck doesn’t even begin to understand sober, forget it now.  He doesn’t need to be sober to understand Tendo’s relation to the elder Becket, several heated kisses being observed throughout the night.  

He’s not completely smashed, but he’s definitely feeling it.  At some point after dinner Chuck ends up in the corner of the couch mostly watching what is going on.  Raleigh keeps flitting about, but keeps checking in on him and bringing him water or beer as the night wears on.  Chuck notices there seem to be some others that are more intoxicated than he is.  

 

Chuck watches as one guest pisses Yancy off, and he calls Raleigh to handle the situation.  The guy looks three sheets to the wind and ready for a fight.  Raleigh steps in and with a deft hand to the back of the neck gives him, what appears to be a vulcan death grip, and the guy collapses.  Just like that! Raleigh catches the guy before he hits the ground, but as the guy comes to Raleigh politely escorts him and another guy out of the apartment.  He’s talking to them both the entire time, and has apparently just defused a bomb that might have ruined the night.  The night wears on and gets a little more fuzzy around the edges.  Chuck isn’t sure if he and Raleigh end up sharing a glass of the whiskey Herman brought, might have been.  They might have shared some beer too, Chuck is certain he’s past his legal limit.  He feels tired and warm, satisfied with everything.  His eyelids start to droop and he can’t seem to keep them open.

 

The next time Chuck is aware of things he’s still on the couch, but he has a blanket over him now.  Herman is still there, but he is asleep in the oversized chair next to him.  Chuck blinks several times to clear the sleep from his eyes, to realize its bright out.  A quick glance at his watch confirms it, it’s the next day.  Part of him automatically thinks he should leave now, but then reason says he’d have to wake Herman, and he’s soundly asleep.  So without much further debate Chuck snuggles down into the chair more.  As he is drifting off again he thinks he feels someone lay a gentle kiss to his temple. But he’s too tired and his body isn’t responding.  The blankets pulled up to his nose, its a nice smell, reminds him of something, and drifts back to sleep.  

When he does wake up again, he’s not sure of how much of it was real or dream.  He thinks he might not remember all of the previous night, and Raleigh is there with more water and drugs to help this hangover.  He smiles at Chuck, but it doesn’t reach his eyes, which seems weird. Chuck’s head hurts too much to really dwell on it.  Raleigh borrows Yancy’s car and gives Herman and Chuck a ride back to campus.  Chuck spends the rest of the day sleeping off his hangover.

  


The semester is starting to wind down, and its approaching finals.  Raleigh and Chuck keep up their study sessions together, even if they sometimes don’t study psychology together. Sometimes they study other subjects independently, but still share a table at the cafe or the library or once or twice in Chuck’s dorm living room.  

After the Thanksgiving party Chuck notices that Raleigh, although being as outgoing and fun as usual, will have quiet withdrawn moments too.  If Chuck hadn’t spent this much time with the guy already he probably would have missed them, they were extremely brief moments. Gone in the blink of an eye, but still they were there.

Chuck doesn’t know what has brought them on, or why.  So he doesn’t do or say anything about it, because how do you really address something that you’re not even sure is really there?

 

 

* * *

They are sitting in the private study room in the back of the library. Studying for their finals. The table is almost too small to hold all the texts Chuck and Raleigh are studying. Chuck takes a break from rereading the section on cognitive function to stretch his neck. Looking up across the table he sees Raleigh with an adorable crease in his brown staring down at his text and note books.

 

Chuck drops his pencil onto his notebook, before standing up and stretching out his arms. Raleigh is so engrossed he doesn’t even look up. On the spur of the moment Chuck decides to take a chance, and leaning over the table places a gentle kiss to the space between Raleigh’s brows.  The crease disappears with the touch.  Raleigh looks up at him slowly, his eyes still half glazed from reading.  Chuck thinks this man is more beautiful than he knows.  Maybe this will help dispel the shadow that lurks behind Raleigh in those passing moments.

 

Still leaning over the table, Chuck’s heart racing in his chest, he dares to forge ahead. He reaches out tentatively with his hand, cupping Raleigh’s cheek in his palm.  Slowly stroking his thumb across his cheekbone.  Raleigh doesn’t move, doesn’t pull back or move forward, pencil still loosely hanging between index and middle fingers.

 

Chuck becomes even more bold.  He slides his hand down Raleigh’s face to his chin, grasping it gently with his index finger and thumb, tilts his head up to face Chuck.  Still no response from the older man.  Chuck licks his lips then slowly, giving the other man time to withdraw, lowers himself towards the upturned face.  

 

Tilting his head to the side to meet up with Raleigh’s face better, he sinks down until his lips find another set of dry but warm lips.  Chuck’s eyes open and watching the face of the older man until their lips meet.  Opening his mouth slightly he pulls back a fraction.  Chuck can feel Raleigh’s breath on his face, still coming in steady and even breaths.  He searches Raleigh’s eyes for a response, he watches him slowly close his eyes, then exhale through his mouth.

 

Chuck wants to shake this man, and yet he holds himself back, afraid of breaking the tension of the moment.  Daring again Chuck closes the small space between them, this time aiming to nibble on the lower lip that now glistens with his own breath.  

 

He doesn’t expect the moan that escapes Raleigh’s lips.  Chuck looks up again, to meet Raleigh’s gaze, his bright blue eyes glassy but alive with something he can’t place yet.  So caught in the gaze he doesn’t notice the hand that snakes its way behind Chuck’s neck.  Still processing all that has just happened and who he is looking at he doesn’t expect the rough hand to pull his face down to crash into soft lips.  They give way quickly to more, a tongue and teeth, grasping to get more purchase on Chuck.  

 

Chuck closes his eyes, lost in the sensation of warmth and the need that has come to bloom in his chest.  He knew he wanted this man, but never would he have imagined his first kiss to be heated like this.  It’s a hunger he has never known before, the desire, no the need to be in contact with more of this person.  Chuck is glad he has strong abs, he takes his other hand off the table top and runs it through Raleigh’s hair.  The older man making an indistinguishable noise in the back of his throat as he continues to conquer and claim Chuck’s mouth.  

Raleigh pulls on Chuck’s hair near the nape of his neck, sending a tantalizing sensation running down his spine. His scalp reveling in the touch, he moans a small noise into Raleigh’s mouth.  

 

Then suddenly Raleigh breaks the embrace, Chuck’s skin cool where heated hands were just touching him.  His mouth seeking its counterpart which has just left him. Chuck lurches forward, returning one hand to the table top to keep his balance and Raleigh blinks at him.  Raleigh backs his chair away with a loud scraping sound. Standing up and taking a step back, Raleigh stares at Chuck like a deer in headlights.  

“I...I.. Chuck,” Raleigh stammers out, shaking his head and looking anywhere but at Chuck. “I’m, we…” a long exhale and closed eyes. He grabs up his notebook and text, slamming them closed, “Chuck, damnit! Why did you wait till now?”

Chuck’s turn to be a little slow. Blinking at Raleigh like he’s lost his mind, “what? Whats wrong with now?” Chuck is starting to get an icy feeling in his gut, his skin tingling with sweat, his palms feel clammy.

“Chuck,” Looking down at the floor Raleigh sounds so defeated, “I thought… Oh godamn”

“Thought what?!” Anger rising to take the place of the uncomfortable feeling rolling around in his gut.

“I, ugh,” Clenching his jaw and working his fists open and closed by his sides Raleigh stammers “I can’t start this with you when I’m leaving!”

“Leaving?! What do you mean leaving?” Anger fully present.

“Look, this has been great and you’re great and … don’t getmewrongbut…. butI’mbeingdeployed.”

Chuck blinks at him a couple of times, confusion taking angers place in his mind.  He tries to makes sense of the jumble of words that just spilled out of Raleigh… “Deployed?” He caught the tail end of the meaning.

“yeah.” long exhale he finally looks up at Chuck and sees the confusion. “I’m in the Army, I’m being deployed after finals.”

“Oh” all he can muster to respond. His brain and gut reeling from the shock to his system. All this time he’s spent investing in this would be relationship only to have it pulled from under him.  No, this is not how CHUCK fuckin’ Hansen Lets this go down.  I want something, I am going to fight for it! “So?!”

Anger is what he’s met with. “SO?! Meaning I don’t have the luxury of calling you to hang out after class anymore.  Meaning I am going to be in an active war zone, Meaning I could die any moment and I don’t want to put that kind of pressure on a relationship  that I haven’t fully figured out yet.” Raleigh deflates, he grabs his books and shoves them into his bag.  

Chuck just stands there, rooted to the spot.  Brain trying to make sense and put the pieces back together before its too late.  He is shouting at in his mind at himself, to do something, to say something. But what? He can’t totally disagree with Raleigh’s logic, the stage of relationship they’re at isn’t strong enough to withstand the kind of stress of active military deployment.  But that doesn’t mean he’s willing to give up on Raleigh yet.  He finds his voice, “Wait…”

Raleigh looks up from his bag, pauses in packing it up, waiting for Chuck to say something more.  He doesn’t say anything at all.  Raleigh goes back to packing his bag.  He stands up, avoiding eye contact he utters “I’m sorry Chuck.  You’re great, but your timing sucks.” Raleigh goes to leave, he pauses and give Chuck a gentle kiss to his temple.  

So familiar, the feel and smell of him.  Then it hits Chuck, “YOU!” Raleigh pauses in his stride towards the door.  Looks back at Chuck, a question unspoken. Chuck closes the distance between them, and pointing right in Raleigh’s face he continues his thought. “It wasn’t my imagination, you kissed me at Thanksgiving, or was it the next day? Well whatever, it was you.  You had a thing for me and didn’t do a bloody thing about it?! Then tell me I have bad timing?! Oh that is a crock of shit!”

Raleighs eyes go wide, then looking away he murmurs “No, that was just after I found out.” Chuck’s turn to take a step back.  “I wanted to tell you but everyone was having such a good time.  You looked so…” Raleigh pauses looking for the word. “serene, no that’s not it… Beautiful. I couldn’t ruin it. And after that there didn’t seem to be any point.”  

“yeah there is a point you bloody arsehole! I get a choice in this matter, just because you are being deployed doesn’t mean we can’t still be friends! And when, Not If, When you come back we can take another crack at being,” Chuck gestures between their chests, “more.” He nods firmly, “So no, you don’t get to make all the choices on my behalf, even if it hurts my feelings.  That is what relationships are.” Chuck stalks back to the table and sits down, turning to look at Raleigh “You better be turning your white ass around and sitting back down, or so help me… Yeah, my timing sucked but yours ain’t much better.”

Blinking Raleigh slowly walks back to the table, and sits down in his previously vacated seat.  Still watching Chuck like he’s a bomb ready to explode at any moment.  Chuck goes back to his studying, the burst of adrenaline helping to focus his mind on the practical items at hand.  Raleigh eventually takes out his books again, and goes back to studying, with several stolen glances Chuck’s way.  

Chuck dared to hope he was right about any of this.  But finals to pass first, then love to conquer.

 

 

* * *

 

**Intermission**

2 Months later Herman comes back to the dorm and nocks on Chuck’s doorframe. He looks up from his desk, Herman limps over the two additional steps to hand Chuck a scrap of paper folded over.  Chuck opens it and it has what can only be a screen name for someone or something.

“What’s this?” He looks up at Herman.

“Got it from Yancy.” Herman turns and starts to leave the room, “he said its a skype name.”

“Did he say who’s?”

Herman yells back from the other room, “Guess!”

Chuck opens skype on his computer and types the name in.  He sends a message to the name.

~hello~ No response.

Sometime next day =wanna give this a try?=

~No that's why I am online in the middle of the night~

=in the army in a war zone, my bad prickly aussie=

~you’re not sorry at all~

=nope=


	2. Sound of Madness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yancy has just as much a bone to pick with Raleigh as Chuck does it seems. Tendo is stuck with picking up the pieces.  
> Chuck gets some insight into Raleigh's life outside what he knows. And maybe everything isn't going as smoothly as Chuck planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I created the Sound of Madness  
> Wrote the book on pain  
> Somehow I'm still here to explain  
> That the darkest hour never comes in the night  
> You can sleep with a gun,  
> But when you gonna wake up and fight ... for yourself?
> 
> ~Shinedown [ (Sound of Madness)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7m3cUNtMEZo)
> 
> There is a bit of time travel in this, the start happens before the end of Ch 1. Then picks up shortly before the intermission of ch 1, then moves forward from there. Please feel free to comment or question if it doesn't make sense. This story has one more installment left before the muses will let it go. Enjoy!
> 
> 1.4.2016 Edit (thanks to [ Sonora](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Sonora/pseuds/Sonora) for pointing out a way to make it more plausible. I know next to nothing when it comes to things military.)

Yancy wakes up to Raleigh rapping twice on the door.  It’s the typical morning routine, Yancy can smell the coffee already brewing.  He stretches before cuddling against Tendo, who despite the knock on the door is still asleep.  Yancy wraps his arm around Tendo’s waist, closing the distance between them.  Pulling Tendo towards him, until Yancy can feel Tendo’s heartbeat against his chest.  He places small kisses on Tendo’s neck, ear and shoulder before he gets any kind of response from the older man.  Tendo humms low in his chest, and grabs onto Yancy’s hand bringing it to his lips to kiss once, twice against heated lips.  One last press of lips behind Tendo’s ear gets a quirk of Tendo’s lips, almost a smirk, but still sleepy.

Yancy extracts his arm and hand from his lover’s embrace as he makes his way out of bed. Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes he slips on a pair of pants before leaving the bedroom.  He shields his eyes from the bright light in the living room/ kitchen of the shared apartment. Padding across the floor to the kitchen he picks up the mug of still steaming hot coffee and takes a sip. _Ahh perfect, Raleigh is such a great brother_ , always getting up early for a run and brewing a pot of coffee.   _Pouring a cup just the way he likes_ , Yancy smiles into his mug.  He pulls down a second mug and pours more coffee, when Raleigh peaks around the corner of the kitchen.  

“Morning Yance” Raleigh is dressed minus the socks and shoes, with a towel still around his neck from drying his hair.  

Yancy murmurs a “morning” as he tops off his own mug, grabs some more milk from the fridge.  Yancy is happy Tendo takes his coffee black, he never messes it up.  He puts the milk back and shuffles back to the bedroom to bring Tendo his coffee, otherwise he’ll never get out of bed.  After depositing the coffee on the night stand Yancy returns to the living room, where Raleigh is running back and forth from his room to the table and chair and back, collecting all his school items.  Raleigh works around Yancy as he sits down on the couch, turns on the TV to watch the morning news.  

Raleigh stops half way between his room and the table, looks at his older brother.  Yancy blinks blearily tearing his focus from his coffee to the screen.  After a few more moments he belatedly realizes that his brother is still watching him. Yancy turns to look at Raleigh, who isn’t watching him but looking out the window past Yance.  Turning his head to look out the window too, Yance sees the view of the city streets and the few buildings that don’t block out the view of the city beyond.  Nothing seems out of the ordinary.  He blinks a few more times, trying to figure out what has Raleigh’s attention.  He gives up and looks back at his brother, just as Rals seems to recover from whatever it was, and shoves the book he is holding into his open backpack.  Rals slings it over his shoulder, adjusts it, then zips up his coat before approaching Yancy.

“Hey Yance.”  

Sipping from his mug again, looks at Raleigh, “umm” he murmurs through the coffee.

Raleigh hesitates, staring off into space it seems, shakes his head, “Never-mind. Catch you later.” Raleigh reaches out and ruffles Yancy’s hair, Yancy is slow to react but tries not to spill his coffee as he shrugs away.  Raleigh is wide awake and quick.  Rals gets a couple quick swipes in before he relents and lets go, turns to leave just as Tendo is opening the bedroom door.  “Later Tendo” Raleigh says on his way out, and is gone in a blink of an eye.

Tendo mug in hand blinks, sips then quirks an eyebrow at Yance.  

Yancy responds to the face with his best guess “I don’t know,” he shrugs both his shoulders, “I’ll ask him tonight.” Yancy looks back out the window, trying to figure out what had Rals attention.  Most morning Raleigh would make the coffee, wake Yancy and head out, it was uncommon for Rals to have enough time to try and talk to either of his roommates, mostly asleep as they usual are.   _Tonight we’ll ask. But now its time to get ready for work._

Yancy gets up from the couch, the news forgotten, and hits the bathroom before Tendo beats him to it.  

 

That day turns into a crazy whirlwind of meetings, and since it’s a Tuesday he has to work late to make up for the time he takes off on Wednesday and Thursday.  Tendo Texts Yancy during lunch, He’s going to be late, big project to test tonight.  

-fine, ETA?-

=8 or later=

-ouch, good luck-

=thanks=

_I’m going to be too tired to be coherent tonight.  Maybe I can pick up Chinese on my way home, make it up to Rals for being so late_. Yancy Texts Rals, gets an immediate response of Yes! _What else was it I wanted to ask him? I can’t remember, it’ll come to me…_ Yancy lets it slide as he focuses back on the task at hand.  He has at least two programs to outline before filling out tickets to get the features fixed on  the currently running programs….

* * *

 

Yancy forgets about the strange behavior of that day, and carries on.  But he finds out what is up the next week at dinner.  

“What?!” He drops his fork and knife clattering to his plate, drawing everyone's attention.

Raleigh stares at Yance, chin raised eyes focused on him.  Tendo and Jaz are staring between Raleigh and Yancy.  

“I’m being deployed,” Raleigh states clearly without raising his voice.  “End of the year, after I finish off this semester.” Yancy continues to stare at Raleigh like he hasn’t seen him in years.  He’s bugging out, he’s freaking out, his little brother can’t be deployed, he’s in school.   _That’s how this works right? The Army reserves pays for the school, but it also means he finishes school._  Raleigh assured Yancy when he signed up that was how it worked. Yancy isn’t sure what to believe any more.   _This shouldn’t be happening, this shouldn’t be happening_ , repeating over and over in his mind.  A lead weight settles in his stomach, his palms feel sweaty, and his pulse kicks up another notch.  His state of distress is clearly shown on his face when Tendo reaches over to put his hand on Yancy’s in a placating manner.

Yancy sits there for a moment, trying to make sense of it all.  He tries to regain a calm and focused composure, that is what Yancy has always done.  Listens and is supportive of his siblings, _but this, this is outrageous!_ Yancy can’t hear anything over the sound of his own blood running in his ears.  “No!”  All he can say, all he can think. Pushing his chair back and standing up from the table, he has to expel some energy, maybe help bring himself back into check.  Regain his calm or at least his composure.  All eyes on him still, as he now paces back and forth next to his chair in the dining room of the apartment.  

Jaz speaks up from her seat “No what? Its not like he Wants to go to war!” She nods to Raleigh who seems to smile wanly in return.

“I knew what I signed up for, and yes there was a slight possibility of being deployed.  But I signed up anyway.”

Yancy turns on Raleigh then, “ **You said**! You said you wouldn’t! Not while you’re in school! **What is this?!** They change the rules now?”

Raleigh slams his palms down on the table, “You watch the news! You should know why they are deploying more troops, calling up the reserves too. We’re at war, or our allies are at war, either way we’re just short of being drafted, okay?!" in a more normal tone he continues, "I’m in an engineering platoon, its still unlikely that I’ll be in direct combat. So... NO, I’m not going to shy away from this….” Exhaling slowly, Raleigh leans back from the table, mumbles “maybe I shouldn’t have told you. If I thought you’d be like this…”

Yancy is still furious, “What was that!? **like what?**! Upset that my **little** brother is going to war?! yeah I’m upset,” then it dawns on him, this is the exact opposite of what he should be doing.  He should be supporting his brother, and understanding. Raleigh may have been a washout all his life if he didn’t decide to sign up for Reserves. Yancy knew he couldn’t afford to help pay for Rals to go to school, even on his salary.  Raleigh had helped Yancy get through school by working right out of high school, living together paying all the living expenses.  Yancy was smart enough to get a scholarship, but there were other expenses for books, and supplies, and everything else.  Raleigh didn’t complain.  He was happy to be with his family.  Raleigh had been happy when Jaz had graduated and got a full scholarship to a local school.  They all three had partied like it was 1999, eating and drinking and having so much fun.  Yancy thought of that now, and the small sad smiles he remembered seeing on his brothers’ face the next day.  Yancy stops dead in his tracks, all of it catching up to him, like a punch to the gut he sits down again.

 

Just like that he does a 180. Yancy's face falls, “Oh my god...I’m… I’m sorry.” He can’t meet Raleigh’s eyes, Yancy’s heart breaks a little bit.   _Why did he not spend a moment of time to consider how Raleigh felt_.  To put himself in his brother’s shoes. “I, I am sorry Rals, I,” he tries to meet his brother’s eyes then.  He meets his gaze briefly, before darting to Jaz and Tendo’s faces.  He sees the shock and upset on those two, he holds eye contact with Tendo.  Tendo faces slides into a look of disappointment, slowly shakes his head. Mouths ‘not the time’.  Yancy grabs Tendo’s hand that has remained outstretched on the table.  Squeezing it twice he looks back at Raleigh. “I know its not your call. Sorry.”  To try and cover up his humiliation at his outburst he grabs up his wine glass, raises it to the center of the table, “let us toast to Raleigh, and his safe return.”

Jaz looks less panicked, Tendo seems content with this gesture, Raleigh exhales slowly like he was holding his breath the entire time.  Tendo grabs his glass up first, to follow Yanc’s lead, Jaz does too, slowly as she watches Raleigh.  Raleigh smirks at Yancy before looking down to the table and finds his glass as well.  Raleigh stares at his brother's wine glass before finding Yancy's gaze.  Raleigh mouths something, Yancy thinks he says ‘thank you’.

 

After dinner they sit around with Jaz drinking wine.  Raleigh still seems a bit stiff, but he’s stopped looking at Yancy like he’s going to take his head off.  Yancy forces himself to relax and act normal.  

Tendo hugs Jaz before retiring to bed, the Beckets all  know how Tendo needs sleep.  He pauses before going to bed, ruffles Raleigh’s hair just like Yancy is fond of doing.  Tendo winks at him, whispers ‘come back kid’, Raleigh nods to that.  

Yancy reaches out to Tendo, Yancy having drunk more than his fair share of the wine, grabs Tendo’s hand and pulls him into his lap with a surprised yelp from Choi.  Yancy leans in close to Tendo’s ear, and whispers “Thanks hun,” before turning Tendo’s face towards him and kissing him soundly on the lips.

“Eh, enough of that, Tendo needs to breath too ya know!” Jaz exclaims to the display of affection.

Yancy breaks it off with a laugh, shoving Tendo back onto his feet and in the direction of the bedroom, with a wink to boot.  

Jaz levels a look at Yancy, who is too buzzed to really interpret it correctly.  Tendo closes the door and for another hour or so its just Raleigh, Jaz and Yancy, talking in hushed tones finishing off their glasses.  Eventually Jaz has to make her way back to her campus.  Jaz gives Yancy a long hug, whispering in his ear “walk me out to the front, Okay?”

He pulls back and looks her in the eye, before slowly nodding as he sees the seriousness in her face.  She hugs Raleigh, who is starting to yawn, up past his early riser bedtime. “night jazzy. See you next week.”

“You take care Rals, okay?”

Raleigh smiles, and Yancy knows Raleigh well enough that despite the wine he can tell he’s trying too hard for their sis.  Raleigh asks, “Want me to walk you out?”

Yancy smartly jumps in at this point, “Nah, I got this. You got class in the morning, get some rest.” Yancy makes a shooing motion.  Raleigh looks like he is about to protest, but Jaz makes the same motion to him. Raleigh waves and heads off to his own bedroom, Yancy escorting Jaz out.

 

Once outside the apartment she levels a stare at him.  But she holds her tongue until they get into the elevator. “What the hell Yance?!”

 

Yancy opens his mouth to protest, but Jaz is quicker and he is reeling from the open palm slap she gives him.  He is shocked, bringing his hand up to the spot, that is growing sensitive by the moment, blinking rapidly to clear the unbidden tears that well up. Yancy looks at his sis, who has her hands in fists resting on her hips. A death glare now present on her face, with a scowl to match. “No you don’t get to say anything. Raleigh has been nothing if not supportive of you, and me, and even your relationship. I understand being upset but you do not get to throw a hissy fit in his face! You need to make up for this, or so help me…” she looks like she wants to spit.  

 

Yancy says nothing as he holds his cheek, he can’t make eye contact after that, so he watches the elevator tick off the floors. He’s ashamed of his outburst now, she’s right, Raleigh didn’t choose to be deployed, but he did sign up knowing it was possible.  Yancy just wants to hide Rals away, so no one can hurt him.  But then Raleigh wouldn’t be happy, being hidden away has never been his brother. Raleigh may not be the smartest one in the family, but he definitely wins for most social of the family.  Yancy hates to admit it but Raleigh is probably more popular with people than either the other Beckets combined.  Yancy needs to come to terms with its his turn to knuckle down and be the supportive brother Raleigh has always been for both Jaz and him.  A side eye at Jaz lets Yance know she’s not going to stay mad at him forever, but he’s not going to push his luck tonight.

Exhaling slowly he lets go of his bruised cheek, then mumbles “you’re probably right Jaz,”

She interjects, “Damn right I am! I love you Yance but sometimes you can be a royal pain in the ass! I want you to make it up to him somehow, grovel, beg, plead, I don’t care, just make it right with him.” Jaz’s turn to exhale loudly, “He’s always looked up to you, you’re the one person he wants to think well of him. Can you do that?”

Yancy is saved by the bell, when the doors open to the elevator. Jaz strides out, Yancy not far behind.  They walk silently out to the front where she quickly hails a cab.  As it comes to a stop she gives Yance a quick hug, with a whispered ‘love you bro’.  

As she gets in, Yancy calls out to her “Jaz,” she turns, “I’ll fix it, don’t worry.” She smiles wanly then, and nods, getting into the cab she is gone in a moment.

 

Making his way along back up to the apartment he is lost in his own thoughts. _If Jaz is going to be this blunt about it, how much more shit is he going to get from Tendo?  How is he going to adjust to life without his brother, even for a short time?_ They’ve lived together their entire lives, suddenly he breaks out in a cold sweat, panic starting to grip him.   _What is he going to do without Raleigh?! His life is so connected to his brothers that the idea of Raleigh being gone 6-12 months is unheard of._  Yancy gets back and closes the door quietly, as he tries to calm his panic.  He’s not prepared for this, or for his brother to still be awake cleaning up the last of the dishes in the kitchen.  Yancy wants to say something, but his mouth goes dry, his tongue like dust.   _What can I say? ‘sorry I was an ass earlier, but its just because I love you’ yeah, not likely to help smooth things over._

Raleigh looks up from the sink, gives Yance a smirk and nod, “hey”.  

Yancy trys to remain calm, act normal. “hey” is all he can choke out.

 

Raleigh turns off the water, grabs a dish towel and turns to face Yancy while he dries his hands.  

 

Yancy notices Raleigh’s look at him, then his surprise, as he steps across the kitchen to grab a bag of peas from the freezer, wraps it in a dry towel and hands it to Yancy. “here, it’ll help avoid the questions tomorrow.”

 

“Hmm, oh thanks.” Yancy accepts the offer, placing the cool frozen food on his swollen cheek.  Raleigh turns to walk out of the kitchen, Yancy stops him “Wait, Rals.” His brother stops, not moving forward or back. “I’m really sorry, its just… its hard for me too. You’ve always been there for me, and now there is nothing I can do in return.”  Yancy drops his gaze to the floor then.

Raleigh doesn’t say anything, he comes back to where Yancy is leaning on the counter and gives him a big hug.  Yancy is surprised for a second then he relaxes into his brother’s embrace, Raleigh’s face leaning against his own for a moment.  Yancy feels the tightness in his chest relax, he knows that they’ll get through this.  Yancy’s shoulders and grip relax into the hug, then Raleigh pulls away.

“Night” whispered as he retreats from the kitchen.  Yancy puts the peas back in the freezer before heading off to bed.  He’ll try and make it right yet.  

 

* * *

 

**AFTER RALEIGH’S Departure**

Yancy wakes up slowly.  He turns over and snuggles up to Tendo, placing a gentle kiss to his neck.  Tendo makes a small hum, letting Yancy know he’s waking up, if ever so slowly, even slower than Yancy himself.  Next he turns to his alarm clock. Blinking to focus his vision, he rubs the sleep from his eyes.  Blinking twice he does a double take, _IS THAT THE TIME?!  Crap, I’m going to be late for work!_

Yancy jumps out of bed yelling “Tendo! Wake up! We overslept!” As Tendo sits up alarmed Yancy realizes they didn’t just oversleep, they never had alarms set in the first place.  As Yancy runs about the apartment trying to get dressed and grab all the things he needs for work he realizes the apartment’s daily routine hinged on Raleigh getting up first and waking Yancy.  But now that Raleigh is gone, there is a gaping hole where he used to be.

 

The rest of the day has a similar feeling.  Something missing, that was key and important.  Yancy wants to keen when he checks his phone at lunch only to realize Raleigh probably doesn’t have cell service where he is to send or receive the data.  Logically Yancy knew all the things Raleigh’s deployment meant for them, but its the little things he overlooked that he now misses most.  Raleigh typically texted his brother at lunch everyday, now Yancy has to jump onto skype to see if he is even available.  Yancy tries, leaves a message but knows Raleigh is on a different time zone, or travelling, or doing whatever that is more important than talking to his brother.  Logic doesn’t make it feel any better, he and Rals have been together for so long that its suddenly a physical ache that he can’t talk to him or see him.  Yancy pulls up the photo on his phone of him and Rals smiling hugging, Tendo took it at Thanksgiving. Yancy swallows down the lump in his throat and distracts himself with work.   _Work has to get done._

Yancy works late and tiredly heads home.  He walks in the door, expecting to see Raleigh in the kitchen fixing up a late meal for them.  His smile fades when he looks around and Rals is no where to be seen.   _Right, my brother is a soldier now._  

Yancy has to admit that Rals has kept to his end of their bargain; Messaging on skype with once in a while video messaging.  

Yancy puts his bag down, takes off his coat and gets busy making food.  Another task helps keep his mind off the missing person in his life.   _Don't dwell on it,  nothing will help bring him back.  Rals wouldn't want me to worry over him,  focus on what I can do._

 

When Tendo gets home almost an hour later he finds Yancy has not only made dinner,  but set up the coffee maker and is sitting at the dining room table reading a text book with the TV on mute in the background.  “welcome home.” Yancy looks up at the sound of the front door.

“hey,”  Tendo pauses,  did you eat already,  or were you waiting for me?”

“hmm, ah I was waiting,” Yancy closes his book, gets up crosses the table, gives Tendo a peck on the cheek on his way into the kitchen.  He pulls the food out of the warming drawer.  

“it's late,” Tendo pauses again,  debating how to word this next thought. “do you dislike eating alone that much?”

“what? !” Yancy looks up surprised. Quirking his eyebrow he shoots Tendo a look of 'why’d you say that'? “nah,  I just thought you'd be home sooner.  then I got caught in my homework. Now sit down and eat before it gets colder.”

Tendo doesn't argue anymore.  Yancy happily chatters about his day,  then listens intently to Tendo.  Near the end of the meal Tendo dares broach the subject again.  “Do you usually have late dinner with Raleigh?”

A shadow crosses Yancy’s face then he looks away.  Responding in volume with body language.  Tendo has to do some damage control before this gets out of hand. “oh Yancy,  it's okay to miss him.  Just,” Exhaling to collect his thoughts,  “remember you don't get to mourn the living.” Tendo reaches out and places his hand over Yancy’s,  absently stroking his thumb across the younger man's knuckles.  

Yancy brings his other hand up onto the table and wraps it around Tendo’s.  

“thanks for the concern, but I'm fine.  Just have to adjust is all.” Yancy gives a half hearted grin.  He pulls Tendo’s hand up to his lips for a gentle kiss. Then he's up from the table clearing away plates and cleaning up the kitchen.  

 

Some things Yancy noticed acutely in Raleigh's absence.  The most apparent the morning routine that Yancy is still adjusting to, an alarm versus the smell of coffee, a knock on the door and a firm reminder on the days he really doesn’t want to get up. Yancy figured out how to set the coffee maker to start automatically, and the alarm is the next best thing he can use to wake up on time.  But there are other things he completely ignores or misses until they become glaringly obvious. Like all the little things Raleigh did around the apartment regularly that Yance now has to do.   That doesn’t even include the fact Raleigh would clean the coffee pot, take out the trash, and half the time made dinner.  Yancy misses the little things the most, like conversation while cooking, or getting to ruffle his little brother’s hair when he could, or the times Rals would fall asleep on the couch on lazy weekends.  Yancy sighs, no sense in dwelling on what isn’t here, he checks the time, _Oh I might be able to catch Rals online for a few minutes!_

 

Its almost a month since Raleigh left and Tendo is starting to worry.  He knew that Yance and Rals are close, but Yancy is becoming withdrawn and almost depressed, if he was forced to put it into words.  Yancy probably isn’t really even aware of it himself.  He is always busy, doing work, school projects, chores around the apartment, cooking etc.  Tendo thinks his energy for this kind of distraction is going to wear him out.  Tendo thinks _I need to have a serious heart to heart with Yance about it._  Tonight Tendo gets home a bit late, but not as late as some nights.  

 

When he gets in he finds a plate of food set aside on the counter for him.  Then entering into the living room he finds Yancy slouched on the couch.  TV on the news again, bottle of wine on the side table half empty, wine glass in hand full.  Tendo is surprised when Yance slowly turns his head then tilts his head back to look Tendo in the eye.  Tendo finds Yancy well on his way to drunk, tears filling his eyes.  “Oh Yance, hun…”

Yancy finally seems to register what he sees, “Oh hey babe. Welcome home” Yancy’s speach is slow, like he’s working around his own tongue.  Then he downs the whole glass of wine like a shot.

Tendo drops his bag and coat on the table before crossing the room to Yancy.  “What is this all about?” Tendo asks as he kneels in front of Yancy, bringing both hands to frame the younger man’s face.  Yancy’s eyes are glassy, his nose and cheeks have a rosy flush to them.  Tendo holds firm forcing Yancy to look at him.

“nothin’, I don’t need a reason.” Yancy looks away again.

Tendo releases his grip on him, he looks about the apartment to put the puzzle pieces together.  Tendo doesn’t see anything particularly out of place or that stands out.  Mental tally tells him _its not a test or a project, maybe something one of his coworkers did or said? No, Yancy doesn’t usually let those things get to him…_ Then his eyes catch on the news banner running on the bottom of the screen.  He reads it for a moment until his eyes go wide. Reading it again before it scrolls off the screen Tendo whips around, taking in Yancy’s state.  “Did you talk to your brother? Is he alright?”

Lolling his head around Yancy responds after blinking repeatedly, “I called and called. I got a message an hour ago,” Yancy pulls out his phone, putting the wine glass down next to the bottle he scrolls through to the messages. Then opening his mouth, and closing it again he turns the phone to Tendo to see.  

Tendo grabs the phone, reads through it.  He exhales the breath he didn't realize he was holding.  Tendo skims the meaning from the messages: _Raleigh is fine, and no where near the explosion that killed dozens of US military personnel.  He can’t even say where he is, because he’s not sure.  But don’t worry he’s fine, skype with you tomorrow_.  Tendo puts the phone down and looks back up at Yancy.  “This is why you’re drunk in the middle of the week, isn’t it?” He doesn’t need confirmation, the tears that escape Yancy’s eyes and spill down his cheeks say it all.

Tendo engulfs Yancy in a hug, sitting on the couch next to him in the same movement. Tendo places Yancy’s head on his shoulder, and brings his other hand up to cradle the back of Yancy’s head.  Tendo feels the slight dampness seep through his shirt, but it’s slow.  When Tendo starts to card his fingers through his lover’s hair, he can feel Yancy’s breath catch. Whatever little shred of stoicism Yancy had clung to is gone in an instant.  He is sobbing into Tendo’s shirt, Yancy grabs onto Tendo’s shoulders as his body is wrecked with the release of the tension he’d been unknowingly holding onto.  Tendo whispers sweet nothings into Yancy’s ear.  Soothing hand motions, stroking his back, until the crying subsides.  

They stay tangled together on the couch like that for a time after Yancy has cried himself out.  Taking deep even breaths let Tendo know its time to break the contact, or risk falling asleep there.  Tendo starts to move again, to try and roust Yancy up.  But instead of Yancy getting up from the couch he brings his head up to face Tendo.  Tendo is mildly surprised by the puffy red eyes, with blue like a cold winters day shining back at him.  

Suddenly hot chapped lips are pressed against Tendo’s, surprised he pulls back instantly, looking into Yancy’s face he understands.  Yancy needs to feel alive, here, reconnect with the life he has here, with Tendo.  Not to focus on the part of him that will always be with Raleigh, but rather trust that he will return, and Tendo is his anchor.  

Tendo broaches the next kiss, slowly closing his eyes as he shifts forward to meet Yancy’s slightly parted lips.  Tendo presses forward, seeking more from the kiss than just the press of lips, Yancy’s lips part to allow Tendo more access.  Tendo can taste the bitter notes from the red wine, as well as the sweetness tones still present on Yancy’s tongue.  Now its Yancy’s turn to run his hands through Tendo’s hair, careful not to ruin the look Tendo works so hard to achieve.  

They lose a little of their minds to the feeling of each other, kissing, hands beginning to seek more.  

Yancy makes a noise, a primal kind of grunt, in the back of his throat.  Tendo breaks off the kiss to look into Yancy’s face once more. Tendo is pleasantly surprised when in a quick deft motion Yancy scoops the rest of Tendo up from the couch and stands up, carrying Tendo bridal style.  Tendo laces his fingers together behind Yancy’s neck, still making eye contact with the younger man.  

“Any objections sweetheart?” Yancy asks pointedly.

A hasty sloppy kiss and a nibble on Yancy’s lower lip is Tendo’s cheeky response. Yancy is still not moving from the spot.  Tendo rolls his eyes at his lover, such a stickler for certain responses. “No objections, now can we move on? Please” Tendo tempted to start swinging his legs hanging from Yancy’s biceps.

Yancy smiles, a genuine one that lights up his whole face, “Yes, we can move on, and over, and under, depending on your mood.” Yancy waggles an eyebrow at the man in his arms then.  

Tendo lets one hand go from Yancy to dramatically point across the apartment to the bedroom door.  “Oh shut up and just take me there!”

“As you wish”

“What you’ve gone all Princess Bride on me? What does that make me, the princess?”

A sheepish grin overcomes Yancy’s features, “Maybe.  I’m the dread pirate robins in that case.” Finally moving across the living/dining room Tendo reaches up and pulls on one of Yancy’s earlobes, “As you wish.” A devilish grin sliding onto Tendo’s face.  A promise for sure.  

 

The next morning Tendo wakes before Yancy, a rare occasion.  He turns off the alarms they have set and gets ready.  Before leaving Tendo sits down on the bed, slowly wakes Yancy with a gentle kiss.  Yancy hums in response, his eyes fluttering open.  Tendo waits for him to focus, eye contact crucial in all important conversations.  

“Mornin’ Yance.  You feeling better?”

“hmm? what?”  Confusion crosses his features.

“Yancy Becket.  I need you to figure out how you’re going to deal with your brother being away in a different manner.”

Yancy sits up in bed.  “Tendo, I’m fine.  It was just a bad day,” Yancy is interrupted.

“Bad day huh? You were dangerously close to falling down a dark hole last night. One that you’ve been trying to avoid looking into for the past month.” he pauses to gauge Yancy’s response to it, when his features remain neutral Tendo continues. “I’ve seen how you’ve been keeping busy, and avoiding thinking about Rals. I miss him too, but that doesn’t mean you should be living a half life to avoid it.  You’re smart, figure out another way, because running yourself ragged and drinking every time there is bad news is not the way to go about it.”

Yancy opens his mouth but closes it again without saying anything.  Tendo watches carefully as Yancy turns away from him, chews his lower lip a little before returning eye contact.  Yancy looks like he’s slightly lost, adrift and Tendo is his life raft.

Exhaling slowly, Tendo leans close to his lover, cups Yancy’s cheek in his palm before sinking the last few centimetres to brush lips.  Feeling the sleepy warmth wrapped around Yancy, Tendo continues the kiss with a sweep of his tongue across the lips and opens his mouth more.  The invitation accepted as Yancy opens up to him as well.  Tendo puts a little more pressure to their lips and dance of tongues before withdrawing.  Looking into Yancy’s eyes Tendo gives an ultimatum, “spend the day to figure it out, I’ll call you out of work.  When I come home we can discuss more, but I want you to really think before I’m forced to do something drastic. Understand?”

Yancy’s eyes go wide for a moment, then he relaxes some, nodding in reply.     

“what was that?” Tendo turning one of Yancy’s tendencies around on him.

“Yes, I understand.”

 

Several days later Raleigh messages Yancy.  There’s a strange lilt to Rals’ tone, but he shakes it off as he chats with his brother.  

A sly look on Rals face says he can read Yancy like a book, “Tendo been taking care of ya?”

Yancy pulls the collar of his shirt up some more, cover the hickey left on his neck.  Blushing profusely he swallows and nods, “yeah, he is.”

“Hey bro don’t worry about it, I’m just messin with ya. Unless you were in my room, in which case I’ll kill you both when I get back!”

“Eww no Rals, we haven’t touched your room. Besides I’m sure it’s a pig sty in there.”

“Hey, I cleaned it up before I left.  Besides isn’t this the pot calling the kettle black?!”

“You should see all the cleaning I’ve had to do since….” Yancy trails off, reaching into an awkward silence that might end with ‘since you’ve been gone.’ But it sounds so cliche even to Yancy, that he can’t voice it.  

Raleigh breaks the silence that stretched too long “I’m sorry Yancy.  I know…”

Yancy cuts him off abruptly, “You don’t need to apologize to me, I know. You didn’t choose this, but… I just, I miss you bro.” Yancy breaks eye contact at that point, embarrassed by his confession.

Yancy looks back up at the screen hearing Rals response, “I miss you too Yancy.” with a furtive glance around and in a low voice  “When I get upset or distracted like that I find clearing my mind helps.  Keeps focus.”

Blurted out in a rush “How? How do you clear your mind? I can’t help but worry about you, if you’re alright, eating enough, do you have friends,  where are you, are you constantly stressed?” Now Yancy blushes a little.  

Raleigh still in a low voice states “I can’t stop you from worrying, but I can make sure to message you. Just let me know when you have news and I will get back to you as quickly as I can.  I can’t do much more for you on that… but have you considered running?”

“What?! How is running supposed to help me not worry?” Yancy’s voice raised a decibel or two higher than before. His tone part exasperation and part demanding.  

Raleigh raises his eyebrows alarmingly high, then collects his features, enlightens Yancy with advice. “Yancy it’s not, the running helps clear your mind when you get into one of those,” makes a gesture at the screen to a wide circle, “moods that you seem to be into.  That and the physical activity brings focus to your body, letting your mind take a back seat.”

Now Yancy’s eyebrows raise, questioning the words.

“Don’t knock it till you try it” Raleigh quips back.

“Is that why you’ve always been a morning runner?” Yancy says with an air of understanding and a bit of contemplation entering his voice.

“Yeah, partly. It helps keep my ADD in check, and makes it easier to focus. That and the activity helps stem off stress insomnia for me.” Raleigh looks away again, so open in his words to Yancy, but the eye contact through thousands of miles too much to bare.  

“That explains a lot.” Yancy mulls that thought over in his mind longer.

Thinking of all the times Raleigh would stay out late near finals, gym bag next to his school bag those days. Yancy takes the heat off his brother for a while, they start to talk about lighter subjects. They get to joking  around for a while before the lilt in Rals voice comes back.  

 

Raleigh asks “can you do me a favor?”

“Of course” is Yancy’s reply, even as his chest constricts and he is trying to keep calm despite his anticipation.

Raleigh looks away from the screen before he asks “will you give my screen name to Chuck?”

Yancy releases a breath he was holding, and visibly lets his shoulders drop, relaxing at the request.  “Rals, you didn’t give your boyfriend your screen name? Is that what you were worried about before?”

Raleigh looks back up into the screen then, “First of all he’s _not_ my boyfriend. Hell I’m not sure if we’re even friends right now.  So yes and no?” redirecting the conversation a little, “I miss you Yance.” He smiles wanly, then continues “but I’m making friends here too. It’d be nice to talk to some other people on occasion… Not that I don’t love talking to you it's just…” Raleigh bites his lower lip, lost for the words.

“Calm down kiddo, I get it.  No need to explain it all to me now.” Yancy pauses taking in his brother’s relief.  “Yea, I’ll get it to him. He was rooming with Herman right?” Raleigh nods, “alright, saves me the hassle of trackin’ the kid down.”

  
  


Chuck only gets a few  chances to message Raleigh during spring semester.  Between time differences and school work they more often message through text only.  

Over the summer semester he has a little more time but Raleigh is just as busy as before. Maybe once every other week they find enough time to get a video chat in.  Usually those are cut short by Raleigh’s crappy connection or other demands on his time.  Chuck puts up with having to make calls late his time, so he usually does it on the weekends or friday nights.

 

Near the end of the summer Chuck is sitting in his dorm, cool and relaxed when the thought hits him.   _What is it like on the other end of the line?_ He thinks about when he last saw Raleigh, he looked okay, he still smiled and joked with him.  Raleigh might have been a bit sweaty and dirt smudged, but that comes with the job it seems.   _Wonder if he’s out in the sun all day?_ Moving on from appearances Chuck thinks about their conversation content. It’s never emotional or anything, very casual and friendly. Shaking his head Chuck focuses back on the reading in front of him, not daydreaming about a certain blonde.   

 

Herman messages him in the middle of the day.

=plans tonight?=

-No. why?-

=Yancy invited us over=

-?-

=Dinner, his treat=

-no catch?-

=huh?=

-nevermind. sure, what time?-

=6pm=

-make it 7 & its a deal- There is an extended pause. Chuck goes back to his reading.  A chapter later he checks his phone again.

=done. meet u at the dorm, carpool=

-see you-

Chuck doesn’t think much of it.  Its dinner with his friend, and some extended friends that he’s met before.   _Nothing to worry or panic over, right?_  Putting it out of his mind he focuses back on the tasks in front of him. _Studying for exams, homework to finish, reading to be done_ , the list goes on.

 

Arriving at the Becket apartment is uneventful.  They are buzzed inside the building like before, take the elevator up, and run into a couple other people in the hallway outside the apartment.  There are three women Chuck’s never seen before, along with two other guys, they all look to be around his age.  

Chuck is surprised to see that all of them are also going to the Becket’s apartment.  The door opens and Yancy welcomes everyone in, ushering them straight into the dining room. The room is set up similar to last time, the table set for a large dinner party.  

“Everyone sit where ever you like, I’ll introduce you all then.” He claps his hands, suggesting they find seats quickly.  Chuck quickly goes to the right, all the way to the end of the oval, Herman sits next to him.  Across from Chuck a short dark haired woman with a brilliant smile sits down, next to her is a pair of asian looking women, one bald the other with jet black hair.  Next to that pair sits another Asian looking man, with a quick calculating look on his face. Chuck looks away and then peers down the line on the other side of Herman.  There’s a man with a wide round face, and dark hair.  Next is Tendo and Yancy is standing behind the chair at the head of the table.  The seat next to Chuck, at the opposite table head, is left vacant.

“Okay we’ll work clockwise starting with Chuck,” Yancy points at him then, Chuck waves slightly, “next to him is Herman,” pause for the mentioned to bow slightly.  Pointing at each in turn, “Zeke, Tendo, I’m Yancy. This is Jin, An, Pang, and Kennedy.”  Yancy nods at the end, then glances around at the blank faces.  “Ugh, Tendo fill them in while I plate the meal.” With that he gives Tendo a quick peck on the cheek and runs out to the kitchen.

Tendo mutters something under his breath, then stands up, taking Yancy’s place. “Okay, you’re all here as friends of ours, and more specifically Raleigh.” That gets some more intense looks sent his way, Chuck being #1 on that list. “Yance planned this to be a surprise for a call to Raleigh later. One of the few times he had a scheduled time to call, so we thought it’d be nice for everyone to join us.” The guests start to nod in agreement with Tendo, “From his freshman year friends,” a wave to the left hand of the table, “to his latest study partners.  Welcome to our home.”

 

Chuck sat at dinner,  speaking little,  spending most of his energy observing the other diners. These people were all friends with Raleigh, in one way or another.  He kept shooting furtive glances at the women across the table in between bites.  Stephanie,  the woman directly across from him,  was clearly a strongly opinionated woman,  but also very open minded.  The conversation drifted from topic to topic,  Chuck spoke enough to be considered polite, but not chatty.

Chuck avoided the highly controversial topics, like politics,  claiming the foreign student card.  Herman nudged him at one point,  giving him a pointed look,  knowing Chuck wasn’t usually this quiet.  Chuck shrugged it off,  whispers “tell you later.” Herman looks surprised but let's it drop  for now.

Chuck continues to observe the others guests. An and Pang aren't  as boisterous as Steph, but clearly share a lot of the same values and ideals,  often finishing each others sentences.  If they were like this all the time Chuck might be weird-ed out by them,  but in the current setting they seemed very relaxed and on the same wave length.  He also noticed several small gestures between them,  a hand hold,  a private smile,  slightly leaning in to each other,  that led him to believe they might be more than just friends.  

The man introduced as Jin was very attentive to the speakers, like Chuck. But Jin seemed to keep a very neutral face throughout the night. Even when he spoke he didn’t show much emotion on his face. Chuck found that perplexing, so he had to listen to his responses more than the others, to try and get any kind of reading on his personality.  He gathered that Jin had at least two siblings, and was a sports enthusiast, but that was about all he could gather.

The last guest Chuck was trying to figure out was Zeke. He reminded Chuck of Raleigh,  bright frequent smiles, an infectious laugh, positive opinions almost every time.  His appearance was drastically different from Rals’, darker skin, hair and eyes,  all soft lines in his face. A moment of jealousy snuck into Chucks brain, _was this guy seeing Raleigh before?  Are they ex lovers?_  Then rational thought broke thru,   _no,  that can't be it,  Yancy and Tendo said these are Raleigh’s friends.  Who would invite an ex to a dinner party like this?_ Chuck continues to muse over this when he snaps back to reality.

“chuck?” Herman says,  looking concerned slightly.

“huh?   Wha?”

“you with us?”

“Yea, sorry bout that.  What’d I  miss?” Chuck looks around,  half the table is standing up,  the other half is getting up as Yancy cleares plates from the table, while Tendo is looking at Chuck and Herman.  

“come on,” Hernan grabs Chuck by the elbow and they get up from the table. “we're resetting the living room for the after dinner show.”

“oh” Chuck quickly helps move the table and chairs to make more comfortable seating for the second half of the evening.  They quickly set up the living room so everyone had a comfortable seat facing the TV/webcam Tendo had set up for the special occasion.  Yancy had a laptop set up facing away from the group to initially start the call on and then he’d transfer it to the big screen.  

When Yancy sat down he hushed everyone. Chuck thought the whole proceeding was a bit elaborately silly, but he was sure Raleigh was going to be thrilled by it.  

“shh.” Yancy then initiated the call, bing bong, bing bong, before and answer. Yancy’s face lit up, “Hey bro!”

Chuck and crowd could hear the slightly muffled reply, the laptop speakers facing away from them, “ey! Yance! Long time no see! How’re you doing?”

“Oh you know, busy as always-”

“You look so much better. Have you been working out **and** running?” (Chuck cataloged that information away for later inquiry. Something was up with the elder Becket?)

Yancy blushed slightly at the comment, then quickly schooled his features, boisterously responding “Yea, but Rals, hold on. Let me get something before we get too far, mkay?”

There is a slight pause, “sure…” Chuck couldn’t see Raleigh’s face, but he could almost bet he was making a face at his brother’s strange response.  Yancy punches a few keys on the laptop, Tendo hits a button on the TV and everyone can see Raleigh. He doesn’t see them yet, he’s not even looking at the screen currently, his profile shown in the light of the screen he’s using.  His brow is furrowed, chewing on his lower lip.  But Chuck notices that despite it all he still looks healthy, his skin and hair the same vibrant lively quality, despite the cool light he’s cast under.  Chuck smiles, seeing him again is really nice, then he remembers there are other people here and Chuck drops his features into a more neutral pleasant look. Yancy and Tendo make a countdown of 3-2-1 with their fingers before they switch the Camera over to the group shot.

Unprompted everyone in the room yells “surprise!”

Raleigh drops his jaw, a look of sheer amazement written all over his features.  Jaw drops for a moment, before he recovers to shout at them, "WHAT is this?! OMG Yance you scoundrel!" Raleigh points at his brother that shows up again on the side of the room. Yance is smiling like the cat that got the cream, thrilled at the response he got out of Rals.  

"Gottcha!" Yance responds. 

Everyone is waving and smiling now, even Chuck lets the smile creep back onto his face.  Its good to be among friends. 


	3. Lovers on the Sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chuck divulges some of his trials and tribulations in young love with a friend from class. She does her best to help out. Meanwhile Chuck tries to get to the heart of the problem only to get sidetracked by a visit from his Dad. Herc sends ripples through Chucks' social life in more ways than one.  
> Yancy talks too much, and we come to a conclusion for this whirl wind boy meets boy, love story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this turned out WAY longer than I ever imagined it would be. Writing it was a flurry of activity and changes. The end took more time to get written than I anticipated. But hope it was worth the wait?  
> I recommend you listen to either [ Lovers on the Sun by David Guetta](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPiW0tkWfeg) or [Pulses by Karmin...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RRrNWF46Ns&nohtml5=False)  
> This is the end of this, I could think up more, but I need to work on some other WIPS. Feedback is greatly appreciated, so kudos and comments welcomed.  
> Disclaimer: I know nothing about boxing, so please do not think this is a good representation in anyway. Its just what my brain made up, and I put into words.   
> As always if you like this come find me on tumblr too. [archerybushidokid](http://archerybushidokid.tumblr.com/) Enjoy.

Chuck is becoming frustrated.  It's like he’s seeing ghosts.  He keeps on thinking he sees Raleigh on campus, but never close enough to be certain.  He suspects that Raleigh is back, yet hasn’t called him or anything.  Chuck has even tried to video call, and always gets declined.  He’s messaged Raleigh and gotten responses, but Rals avoids answering the direct question of _when are you coming back?_  

 

“Ugh!” Chuck scratches out his answer in his notebook for the third time, his mind unable to keep focused on the task in front of him.  

“What’s got you in such a bind Hansen?” 

“Huh?” Chuck looks up to see his lab partner across from him.  Mako is very level headed, quiet at times, but sharp as a tack.  Chuck likes working with her, she doesn’t see a need to prattle on about everything during lab time. Chuck bites the inside of his lip, considering telling her, _will that cross the unspoken rule we seemed to follow_ , no personal talk until the work is done.

As he ponders that she beats him to the punch “You’re uselessly distracted, so get it off your chest.” She levels a ‘no bullshit’ glare at him.  

He relents. Huffs out “I think my,”throws up air quotes, “‘would be’ boyfriend is avoiding me.” said out loud it sounds so much more harsh. He flinches from his own thoughts.

“The blonde PHD guy?”

Now Chuck is surprised.  _ How does she know? Did I say something? _ The confusion must be written on his face.

“I overheard you on the phone one day outside of class. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop… but you were very,” she pauses, looking around for the word, “animated about it.”

“Oh. Yeah, that’s the one.”

“have a picture of him?” 

“Huh? Uh, yea…. why?”

“well it's a helpful visual aid to your story. Let's see it.” She gestures for Chuck to hand over the evidence.  He quickly pulls out his phone, swipes through his photo gallery, finds a pick he took while drunk on Thanksgiving, Raleigh is smiling like usual, Chuck’s arm slung around Ral’s neck, a goofy look on his own face.  Chuck scrunches his nose at the picture, swipes to the next one, which was taken earlier on the same day.  Its Raleigh smiling again, this time sitting at the table, with the older Becket next to him, shoveling food into his mouth.  Clearly Chuck took this pic, sober at the time.  He turns the phone to face Mako.

He adds, “the smiling blonde, the one eating is his brother.”

“Ah! You’re after Becket?!”

Eyebrow quirks, “How do you know his name?”

“He goes to my Boxing gym.  Doesn’t say much, but knows how to fight, which is fine by me." She shrugs, "He is a lot of fun to spar with.”

“You Box?!” 

“Don’t be so surprised Chuck. I could kick your ass several ways in martial arts, You know that. Really.” She makes an annoyed sound in the back of her throat. 

“Sorry, just, wait! He goes to your gym? Since when?!”

She ponders that, “hmmm, probably been there about two weeks.” She grabs Chuck’s phone from his hand and takes a closer look at the picture. Chuck is distracted by the fact that Raleigh’s been back stateside at least two weeks, and hasn’t once contacted him.   _ What the hell?! I'm not seeing things then.  
_

“I’ve never seen him look like this though.” Mako states very quietly, still scrutinizing the photo.  “When was this taken?”

“Last Thanksgiving.  He invited me over for the Becket celebration.” 

“You want to confront him?”

“Confront?! I want to beat him up for avoiding me!”

“He probably has a good reason for it. But if you’re looking to see him you can come by the gym one night.” She hands the phone back to Chuck, the photo of drunk Chuck and Raleigh now displayed on the screen. Chuck rolls his eyes,  _ ugh, knew I should have deleted it _ . Mako pulls out her planner, quickly flips through it, “It’s sparring night again on…” she swipes a couple pages, “ Two days time.  If you want to come with, and watch some matches.  But no causing a scene in the gym.  You’re more likely to get thrown out than get the answers you’re looking for.”

“where’s this place?” Chuck is ready to do a bit of snooping to see what the real story is. Phone at the ready he types up the location, 'Cherno Alpha Gym' sounds a bit weird but whatever, then the time in his calendar as Mako reads it off.

* * *

Few days later Chuck follows Mako to the gym.  She is in workout gear, with a duffle bag hanging from her shoulder.  Chuck tried to disguise himself some, wearing an over sized hoodie, and baseball cap.  Mako shakes her head at him but doesn’t say anything.

 

Chuck follows a pace behind her the whole way.  When they get into the gym she signs him in under a fake name.  She points him to the small viewing area, and heads to the locker room.  Chuck is left alone to ponder what he plans to do when he sees Raleigh, its not like he made Chuck any wild declarations before he left, _hell he didn't even_ _suggest I wait for him_.  Its weird to think about it now, they weren't dating when he left, and yet Chuck continued to call and message Raleigh.  Right now it seems that for once Chuck is more invested in a relationship than he originally bargained for.  It's a rather sobering thought. 

Thankfully he is pulled out of his thoughts when someone else enters the viewing area.  He politely moves down and gives them room.  He doesn't have to wait long for the first sparring match of the night to begin.  His attention is divided when more people come into the viewing area, he tries to go unnoticed by everyone.  He turns his attention to the match going on now.  

 

Chuck quickly gets invested in each fight. Forgetting he is here for one fighter in particular.  Several matches in and people are flowing in and out of the ring and viewing area.  Each bout is more intense than the last.  Chuck’s mind starts to wander again.. _ what if Raleigh doesn’t want to see me because he met someone? what if he’s… _ thought stops as he recognizes one of the fighters.  

He perks up, but deflates just as quickly, it's only Mako.  Despite himself he really focuses on her and her opponent.  The other guy is short, but very muscular, biceps like a bodybuilder.  He may have weight on Mako, but he doesn’t have the speed to make it count.  She circles him a few times, getting the feel of his movements, then she lets loose a barrage of punches and jabs.  Towards his face, which he protects and then leaves his abdomen open for her follow up attacks.  Hits to his ribs, chest, she even sneaks in a shot to his back and shoulder.  

The bruising not enough to end the match they go a second round.  Now he’s even slower than before, unable to react quickly enough to her footwork.  Second round she gets a solid hit to his head, he doesn’t go down, but stumbles back.  The ref intervenes and calls it, the guy is mostly stunned.  Chuck grins, _knew Mako had it in her_.  She keeps her features calm and doesn’t celebrate her win but bows to her opponent as he is helped out of the ring.  She quickly clears out of the ring.  Chuck sits back in his chair, unaware that he had leaned forward to the edge during her fight.  

He stands up, stretching his legs and considers talking to Mako, but one look her way says otherwise.  She shakes her head once.  He sits back down.  

She disappears for a while, Chuck muses over the fight. Mako was really something else, he knew she was quiet and composed on the outside, and full of brimstone inside. But that philosophy applies to her fighting style as well.  He sees Mako in a whole new light, well toned muscles, her economy of movement, her focus.  Chuck was seeing another side of her, and he liked what he was seeing.  How could he not see her like this before, _when she was in front of him all this time?_ Because he was focused on school, or his old man would come and steam roll him for slacking off.  But he was still doing well in class, and now he has to spend labs across from Mako, he doesn’t think he will see her the same way again. Another fight picks up and ends before Chuck refocuses on the present. He is aware just in time for Mako to join him in the spectator seats.  

“oh good, I didn’t miss it.”

“Miss what?”

Mako looks at Chuck like he is stupid.  He raises an eyebrow to avoid sticking his foot in his mouth.  She sighs, leans close to Chuck and in a soft voice she states “Raleigh’s fight of course, you idiot. Kinda the reason you’re here.”

“oh right. Uh yea.” He averts his gaze to the ring again, mutters, “you were really good out there.” 

Mako leans forward to look Chuck in the eye, he tries to avoid eye contact, she might see his blush. She smiles, just a little, “Thanks,” she leans back in her chair, focused on the ring again, “Oh here he comes!” she hits him in the arm in case he wasn’t already watching.

“Ouch!” he spares a quick look at her, sees she’s watching the ring, and rubs his arm.  _ She hits hard, note to self don’t screw with her, she’ll leave a mark. _  He looks back to the ring as two men enter, one has a long sleeved zip up hoodie on, the other one is shirtless already.  The shirtless man is gruff looking, slightly heavier build, with auburn hair, cut short. Looking at the other figure, who’s got his back to Chuck and Mako, “how can you tell?”

“Its him alright. Only guy that keeps covered up going into the ring. Trust me.” Mako reassures him.

“If you say so.” Chuck studies the man, whose face is still in the shadow of his hood.  The man has more build than he remembers seeing on Raleigh, but he is the right height. Then the mystery man throws his hood back with a fluid motion his other hand pulls his head gear on.  In that split moment Chuck’s breath hitches. He caught sight of the fair skin and blonde hair, slightly longer than the last time he saw Raleigh on skype, but unmistakable regardless.  

“Told you” Mako retorts, and Chuck lets out the breath he was holding.  He makes a small nodding gesture to assuage her, but he doesn’t take his eyes off Raleigh.  Rals finally shucks off the hoodie, just before pulling his gloves on.  Chuck is mesmerized.  He couldn’t look away even if he wanted to.  Chuck is soaking up every movement, and every inch of him.  

Now Chuck can guess why he stays covered up, his left side is covered in burns, angry looking things, that lace around his torso, coming up from below his waistband and around his rib cage to his shoulder and down part of his arm.  Chuck can’t really tell for sure if they are burns from this distance, but there is definitely something unnatural about the complexion of Raleigh’s skin. There is a smaller set of marks on his right bicep, maybe scars from stitches? Very minor in comparison to whatever is covering his torso.  Beyond that there was clearly a tattoo on his left bicep that is warped from the burn that crosses it. 

Chuck is wide eyed staring at him now, as Raleigh pops his mouth guard in and pulls his gloves tight.  Mako runs her hand past Chuck’s nose, “Hey, you there?” 

snapping out of the catharsis, Chuck returns to the present.  “Uh, yea.”

“good, its about to start. I’d hate for you to miss it.” she smirks at Chuck, “You think I’m good? Watch your boy there. He’s got an instinct for this. it's uncanny.” Chuck turns back and leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees.  Chuck marvels for a second, Mako’s impressed by him, he must really be something special.  She does not impress easily.

  
  


Unlike Mako’s match, it went a full three rounds.  But Chuck was so stunned by the look on Raleigh’s face at the end that he was lost to the world until Mako started prodding him to move. “Come on now! Or we’ll miss our chance to catch him.” she grabs at Chuck’s arm with both of her hands, pulling him up out of his seat.   _ Damn, daydreaming is becoming a bad habit around this guy _ .   Mako pulls him along to the locker rooms, without a moment to collect himself she abruptly shoves him through the door of the men’s locker room. 

Suddenly he is standing in the entryway, another guy comes in shortly after him, and he is forced to move in or out.  I _ ’ve gotten this far, no chickening out now _ . He excuses himself and heads in, he goes all the way to the end row of lockers, hoping the guy behind him doesn’t follow.  He starts looking around trying to look normal, and not like a snooping pervert.  He glances up from this row of lockers,  _ no one in this row _ , he listens intently, from the sound there are only 3 or 4 guys in here now.  He peers back at the other row of lockers on his way to check the bathroom stalls.  Doing one more quick look around, make sure no one is watching him, he peeks under the stall doors, only one pair of legs. Definitely not Raleigh. (unless raleigh got his feet tanned to black!)  Chuck tries to figure out how he could have missed him,  _ ah ha! He must have hit the showers _ , he does another walk by, peering under the curtains this time.  two stalls occupied, one might be Raleigh, so instead of being a total creep he goes back out into the lockers.  Sits down on a bench, pulls out his phone to look like he’s not stalking someone and waits till he hears the water stop.  Both men come out at the same time, and to Chuck’s shagrin neither of them is the man in question. 

Quickly texting Mako without getting up, trying to look normal.

<did Raleigh come out?>

~No~

<he’s not in here>

~Damn, he’s escaped again~

<appears so.>

~why are you still in there?~

<trying not to raise suspicion>

~ah, get out now~

<on my way> Chuck’s not sure why he sends the last text, he’s standing in front of Mako by the time she receives it.  “He slipped us somehow.” Chuck feels a little defeated, that look on Raleigh’s face, it was so out of place.  Like some of the life had gone from him, a glassy eyed facsimile of the man that left months ago.  Chuck shakes himself to rid the thought from his mind,  _ things to do before we think that way _ .  

“hold that thought,” Mako grabs one of the men leaving the locker room, whispers a quick question to him, he shakes his head and walks away.  “Should have guessed.”

“Guessed what?”

“He doesn’t shower here. That’s probably how we missed him, he’s in and out in a flash. He’s probably on his way home already.”

“Perfect!”

“huh? how is that perfect?”

“I know where he lives, so we can walk there,” Chuck is cut off.

“Woah there lover boy, this is where the ‘we’ ends. I’m not stalking him on the street. Besides I’d imagine that is the best way to get knocked out.” She looks at Chuck waiting for recognition to register, sighing she adds, “I don’t know about you, but if someone was following me I’d try and knock them out. I do not want to be on the receiving end of that, especially not him. No thank you.” She shakes her head emphatically to that statement.

Chuck takes this in and processes the idea. Exhaling loudly, he concedes “You’ve got a point. Might be time to change tactics.”

“Oh, and what might that be?” Mako shuffles her duffle up her shoulder as she starts to walk toward the doors. 

“Calling at the Becket residence. In the Daylight.”

“Oh” she looks surprised.

“Why is that so surprising.”

“it's not really. I just didn’t expect you to be so straightforward so quickly.  Thought you’d have some other scheme up your sleeve before that.”

Eyebrows raised to his hairline, he sounds incredulous “What is that supposed to mean?!”

“oh nothing,” she shrugs and looks away, “Best of luck with that. Just remember if he’s avoiding you there might be a reason for it.” She makes quick eye contact before waving, “later Chuck.” she hesitates, turns around once more, “Oh and Chuck.”

“yeah?”

“Let me know if you need help, or to talk, mkay?”

Chuck paused, looking at her with a bit of confusion crossing his face, before he lets a smile replace it. “umm, Yeah thanks, I’ll do that.” Chuck nods to Mako as they go their separate ways. 

Chuck checks the time on his phone,  _ It’s late now, I’ll pick up this adventure tomorrow _ . While he’s got the phone out he sends a quick message to Raleigh. Hits send and waits a moment, no immediate response, so he keeps walking, putting the phone away.

 

* * *

It's three days later that he finally gets the chance to make a visit to the Becket residence.  Not that he didn’t stress out thinking about what is going on between him and Raleigh, but school always comes first.  His dad was supposed to come to town in another day, so best to keep up on work or get chewed out for being an idiot.  Chuck had to squeeze the time in, skipping lunch in hope of getting to the Becket apartment while someone is still around.  

* * *

 

Yancy is surprised when he hears the buzz for the front door.  “Who could that be?” Yancy tries to think if he forgot an appointment or if Raleigh or Tendo forgot their keys. Checking his watch Yancy nods to himself.  _ No, it's still too early for either of them to be back, besides the key rack is empty but for his own set _ .  He looks through the peephole, even more surprised to see an Auburn haired head, face turned away, but Yancy can guess who it is.  

Sighing he considers if he should let the kid in or not, Raleigh’s not home besides.  

He braces himself, opens the door, “How can I help you?”

“Oh Hi…” Chuck seems nervous now, fidgety, “Is uh, Raleigh in?”

“No.” Yancy sticks to short and sweet. Why wouldn’t he just meet up on campus, as opposed to trekking all the way out to their apartment.

“oh.” Chuck doesn’t move, just stands there numbly. Yancy takes pity on the kid.

“Want to come in?” He moves back, opening the door all the way, gestures for Chuck to come in. Chuck ducks his head, hesitates a moment then practically jumps through the doorway. He proceeds to stand awkwardly in the kitchen, Yancy closes the door. He looks the kid up and down, wonders why he’s so nervous and jumpy. “What’s up?”

Chuck head snaps up, finally looking at Yancy. “That’s what I came to ask.” Chuck makes a stern face, almost a pout.

“What’dya mean?”

Chuck cuts him off “Raleigh’s avoiding me. Why?!” Pointing an accusatory finger at Yancy, like he has something to do with his brother’s shortcomings.    _ Wow, not one for small talk, this is zero to sixty in no time _ . Staring down at the finger stuck in his face, he considers what to do next.

Slow exhale, Yancy walks past Chuck into the living room, turns the TV off as he thinks of a response.  Chuck follows the two steps, stands on the threshold between the kitchen and living space watching Yancy’s every move.  “Chuck, I don’t know if he’s avoiding you in par”

“Bullshit! Its written all over your face! You know what’s going on, now spill!”

Yancy blinks once or twice, taken aback by the aussie’s bluntness. “You don’t mince words do you. As I was saying,” Yancy pauses to let Chuck interject again. Silence maintained, Yancy continues, “I don’t know if he’s avoiding you in particular, but he is definitely withdrawn from his previous habits.” 

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?!” Chuck has a grade A scowl on his face. 

“Meaning he’s dealing with some shit.”

This finally seems to set the gears in motion in Chuck’s head. The scowl melts and is replaced with some hurt and confusion. Yancy understands this, not a month ago that was him.  He makes a decision, he’ll share some of the story to avoid the pain of drawing it out.  “Come here Chuck. Have a seat.” He pats the sofa arm as he settles down into the far end of the couch.  

Slowly Chuck crosses the room, lowers himself into the couch cushion, eyes locked on the wall behind Yancy.  

“Here is the story…” Yancy tells Chuck that Raleigh was in an accident, or more like an attack.  Driving from one location their convoy was caught in an ambush.  The hummer in front of Raleigh’s exploded, mines or some other explosive, Raleigh took evasive action. But it was too late, next thing he knows the hummer is upside down, he and his buddies come to in the fire.  Raleigh fought his way out of the hummer, with one of his squad mates.  He goes back to drag the next guy out, gets Duc, (his friend) halfway out, when there is another explosion, debris and shrapnel flying all over. **  
**

Yancy pauses in the story, the color has drained from the Aussie’s features. He looks shocked and amazed at the same time. He opens his mouth, but says nothing, swallows and closes his mouth again.

Yancy continues. Raleigh got Duc away from the vehicle, to a spot with the rest of the unit.  Raleigh is bleeding and burned now, and as he tries to patch up some of Duc’s wounds, he dies. Right in Raleigh’s arms. "I think Rals might blame himself some for it... Anyway..." cough "Raleigh spent time in hospital, he’s still got some visible scars and burns, he even sustained minor but permanent hearing damage.  So don’t whisper to his left side, he can hear, but not very good on that side.” 

Chuck sits slightly slack jawed.  Yancy continues, “When Rals was discharged from the hospital, he didn’t come home straight away, no. He first order was to go to Duc’s funeral, he served as a pallbearer at the service.” 

Yancy looks away from Chuck, not comfortable saying it, but knowing it needs to be mentioned, “I’m afraid he might be avoiding you because you remind him of Duc.”

“What?! How?!”

Yancy remains calm despite the anger thrown at him in that voice. “Duc was a lot like you.  He had a very similar accent and physical features. Those two got along as well as you and Raleigh did, like a house on fire!”

 

Chuck continues to sit there, feeling a little lost and adrift in a great wide ocean, and all he’s got is a row boat.  Yancy gets up from the couch after a while, goes into the kitchen.  He comes back out with a glass of water. Placing it on the table next to Chuck, he says, “Stay if you want. I’m going to make dinner, Raleigh should be back,” he checks his watch, “ in another hour or so.  I'll make enough dinner for you too.” 

Chuck feels a little numb, Yancy just dropped a  bomb on him, and then carries on with dinner and a conversation like nothing important happened.  “Um,” all that Chuck’s mind can come up with, his higher functions have stalled out on him.  

“I’ll make you a portion then.” with that he goes back into the kitchen letting Chuck be to ponder over this news.  He sits there motionless for how long he’s not sure, but he can hear Yancy making little noises in the kitchen, opening and closing drawers, plates and pans moving around. 

Chuck finally processes that the water is there for him.  He reaches out and downs the whole thing, hoping the cool sensation in his throat and gut will extend to calm his mind. _That explains the burns and scars, that explains why he hasn’t been as present mentally as physically._  Chuck returns the glass to the end table, then leans back in the seat, stares up at the ceiling.  The afternoon schedule of classes and work forgotten, until he gets a buzz from his phone.  

Slowly he takes it out, it’s from Mako.  he reads it, and returns a quick message. 

~Can I take you up on that talk?~

-yea. why, what’s up?-

~You free now?~

-did rals talk to you.-

~I’ll tell you when i see you~

she sends a location, and with no additional words or fanfare Chuck stands up, and walks out of the Becket Apartment.

 

Yancy glances up from his work in the kitchen, but doesn’t say anything or try to stop Chuck.  Yancy hears the door click shut behind him, his only other thought is  _ I hope Chuck figures out how to approach Rals. If he does it wrong I’m going to be the first one to punch him in the face. _ He smirks and chortles a bit, if  _ Tendo was here to see this, he’d be the first to punch ME. hah, love him for it though. _

* * *

 

Next day Chuck is making plans with Herman to meet up with his dad. The talk with Mako helping to clear his head, think more logically.  His dad in town for a couple days Chuck thinks, the issue with him and Raleigh can wait another day or two.  

Herc is the most intimidating man Chuck has ever known, and even after not seeing him for 8 months, it's still true. Herc might have a bad habit of working out all his problems. Being in the Military for so long, it's still his habit. Chuck wonders if his old man didn’t pick up bodybuilding as a hobby too.  

“ Oi! How are you boys?!” Herc engulfs both Chuck and Herman in a rib crushing hug. 

“Ow!” He quickly releases Herman, Chuck is not as lucky, getting all of his father's attention.    
“HEY! Let up Old man!” Chuck struggles to escape his father. Laughing heartily, he releases Chuck, gulping in air to be overly dramatic he gives his dad a stink eye.

A slap on the back sends Chuck flying, barely catching himself, he glares again, but is promptly ignored. “Oi! Enough of that! We come to get you and the thanks we get is gettin’ strangled and beat?!” 

“Ohahhaha, Oh you’re the joker Charles.”

“Its Chuck, DAD!” 

Herman exhales, looking exhausted already he looks from father to son.  He starts walking towards the parking garage.  Chuck watches his friend, and takes the cue, grabs his dad’s duffle bag from where he dropped it. 

“Come on, lets get going.  Get you checked into the hotel so we can go to dinner.” 

“Right right, things to do, people to see. Oh speaking of,” Herc keeps walking but looks at Chuck pointedly and dropping his voice for only Chuck to hear, “When do I get to meet this ‘special friend’ of yours?”

Chuck keeps walking, to help hide the shiver that runs up his spine, a lead weight settling in his gut.   _ Should have guessed he wouldn’t pull his punches. Ugh, what do I do?!  _ Chuck’s brain scrambles to come up with a valid response.  Delay tactic, anything!

“Uh, well Its kind of, uh, a bad time for them.  So not sure we’ll be able to get together this weekend.” Chuck is breaking out in a cold sweat, not even sure if he can disclose anything more.  Chuck looks back at Herc, see if he is buying it or not. 

Herc shrugs and lets it pass, for now, Chuck thanks his lucky stars for that.  “Well I’ve got some friends in town too, so maybe you can find someone to join us for dinner tomorrow?”

Chuck fakes nonchalance, shrugs, “maybe.” All he can come up with to respond to a social bomb dropped on his head. 

 

The ride to the hotel, uneventful, all the previous tension lost in friendly discussions between Herman, Herc and Chuck.  Herc checks his phone, Chuck lets the silence be while his dad responds to some messages.  Herc smiles, and Chuck gets another bad feeling, “what is up Dad?” He plays it cool, curious as normal.

“Oh Nothing. You have plans during the day tomorrow son?” 

Chuck thinks it over, “I’ve got a lab group in the morning, after that I’m available to serve as tour guide if you like.”

“That’ll do nicely.”

Chuck doesn’t inquire more, he’s got enough on his mind to worry about what his dad is going to do in his down time.  

 

Mako gives Chuck a quizzical look at labs, “What?!” He bites off the words, harsher than he meant to be.

“Oh nothing, you just look like shit is all. I was going to ask why, but apparently you’re not in the mood to talk. So let's get this over with, right?”

Grumbles, and then refocusing his attention to the work at hand.  They have two hours of lab, and near the end Chuck has relaxed enough from the work that he figures he should apologize. 

“Sorry Mako.”

“For what?”

“For grousing at you before.” He exhales slowly, keeps writing down the numbers from the test equipment, without looking up at Mako he continues, “My dad’s in town, and he always gets under my skin somehow. You didn’t deserve to get crap from me, when it's clearly not your fault.”

She reaches out, rests a hand on chuck’s shoulder and squeezes lightly. The warmth of her hand helping to calm him. She smiles at him, “It's okay. I get it. But try not to cut off my head when I’m just trying to help.”

“Yeah, my bad.” He finishes writing the numbers, handing it over to her to check. 

“Oh is your dad retired Military by any chance?”

Raising an eyebrow at the randomness of the question, he nods his head. “Yeah, why?”

“Oh my dad was meeting an old friend, today. Usually that means military folk, it seemed coincidental that your dad was in town.”

“How would your dad know my old man?” 

“How should i know? International warfare, somewhere? Beats me.” She shrugs and forgets the conversation, instead focusing back on the notes in her hands. She asks Chuck about a set of numbers and they both focus on the task at hand. 

Before they part ways at the end of the lab Chuck thinks Mako might be the perfect fill in for his ‘special someone’ for dinner. “Hey, you have plans tonight?”

“Not that I know of why?”

“Would you mind maybe… Joining-me n’ myoldmanfordinnertonight, possibly?” He rushes it out to avoid losing his nerve. She stands there blinking at him for a moment longer.  

“Um, sure.”

Chuck exhales the breath he was holding.  They exchange some details, Chuck saying he’ll message her a location when he figures out where that will be. He waves as she heads out, she smiles a shy smile, turns and is out the door.  

 

* * *

 

When Chuck meets up with his dad he wishes he had asked more yesterday. There are a couple of noticeable bruises blooming on his old man’s forearm, and a small scrape on his cheek.  Chuck trying to not sound accusatory but curiosity killed the cat. “What happened to you?”

Herc smiles crookedly, “you should see the other guy!”

“You’re picking fights?! What the hell’~!”

“Oh calm down, I went to a boxing gym with a friend.  They decided to teach some of the youngins a few things.” He winks, “turns out some of the kids there know a thing or two.”

Chuck rolls his eyes,  _ only my old man would find a boxing gym for funsies in a foreign city.  _ “OKay, well anyway, shall we spend the day in the city? Or you rather sleep that off?” Vague gesture to all of Herc. 

“Come on! Let's do this thing!” Herc pumps his fists, excitement flooding both Hansen's’ systems.

They actually have a lot of fun wandering around the city, hitting one or two of the tourist traps before finding a cafe to grab a drink in.  They wander to some of the free attractions, taking some photos with statues, and shots of the city in general.  

 

“Oh Chuck,” Herc asks while he is messaging on his phone for a moment.

“Yea?” Chuck looks at his dad, wondering where this could go.

“Mind if I invite my old buddy to dinner with us?” Still texting as he asks, looks up to see chuck pull a quizzical look.

“Sure, you have a plan of what you want? Fancy, Quick, outdoor seating, what?”

“Don’t forget you’ve got someone to invite too, don’tcha?”

Chuck was hoping he could ignore that part. He grumbles, and remembers he invited Mako, so he perks up. “Yeah I did.” He pulls out his phone, preparing to message her, “still wondering if you had a choice of location, or am I picking something?”

“You won’t pick anything nice enough, so I got a recommendation from Stacker.”

“Oh, I’m not classy huh? Wait! What?! Stacker?! Like Professor Pentecost?!”

“Huh? Oh I don’t know, maybe. Why would you assume that?”

“Old man, Stacker is not a common name, I’ve never met another one besides him. Humf”

“Oh well I suppose there is that.”

“Okay this just got weird, but whatever. How about a location, got a name yet?”

Herc checks his phone, pulls up a name and location, Chuck almost freaks out on the spot. Barely checking himself, he sputters out, “But, that isn’t just nice, it's damned fancy!”

“Yea? So? Your date not clean up well?”

“Thats not it, that's just… Damn.” He starts texting Mako in a frenzy of apologies and mutters curses under his breath. 

“You alright over there?”

“FINE, DAD.” He keeps texting while speaking through clenched teeth. 

Mako responds promptly, there is a long pause, chuck sends another dozen messages, then she finally replies. She will be there, dressed for the occasion too. In the middle of the texts with Mako he gets another notification, he almost missed it in his rush. Chuck clicks on the message, and gasps despite himself.

“You alright over there? Having a heart attack over a restaurant? I can change it if it's that big an issue.” 

Chuck hears this but doesn’t respond right away, still engrossed in his phone. He remembers to breathe, and respond “No Herc! We’re all fine here, don’t change the plans again. We’re good.” He says the last thing to reassure himself more.  _ Of all days for him to message me! _

Chuck clicks on the message.

R: How’s it going? You have time to talk soon?

C:Uh, hey. I’d love to talk…

C:Busy right now, how about tomorrow?

Chuck hits send before he realizes his dad is still around tomorrow as well. He doesn’t have to worry about it though, there’s a response already.

R:Morning?

C:early, yea!

He can’t help himself.  He actually feels lighter, just from messaging the adorable jerk! Herc playfully punches him in the shoulder.

“Hey, earth to Charles!”

That snaps him back to earth ASAP. “Don’t call me that!”

“What? Your name? You think it's uncool to be a Charles? Chuck so much better than your given name?”

“Yeah, it is cooler, thanks!” He lets the argument distract him from his potential talk.  

* * *

 

A stop at his dorm, the hotel and then a cab ride later they are waiting outside a 5 star restaurant in the ritzy part of town.  Chuck feels weird wearing a collared shirt and tie, standing next to his dad, in his blazer and button down shirt. 

When Professor Pentecost, excuse me, “Stacker” steps out of a cab it's shock enough, but then he leans in and helps Mako Mori out of the cab after him. Chuck can’t help but gape open mouthed at the pair, looking more impeccable and stunning than Chuck could have imagined. A quick glance at his old man, and Chuck is not the only one looking surprised.   _ Wait, Pentecost and Mori came together?  _

Chuck remembers his manners and stops gawking, and rushes to offer Mako a hand, polite etiquette.  She nods and Pentecost strides in front of them to meet up with Herc. The two older men nod to one another and shake hands firmly. Chuck takes the momentary opportunity to ask Mako, “Wait, how do you know Prof. Pentecost?”

She rolls her eyes, “He’s my dad, you numbskull.”

Chuck’s eyes bug out, and he looks from the man in front of him to the woman next to him, repeatedly. Mako laughs at his antics, “I’m adopted, obviously. I get a great rate for tuition at the school too. I’m lucky I don’t need to take psychology, I already got AP credit for that when I was in High school.” She leans in to Chuck, whispers in his ear “I learned from the best, so I’ve got all your neurosis pegged already.” She pulls back and winks at him then. Chuck swallows, feeling a little less comfortable now. 

She notes his reaction, and smacks him in the chest with her free hand, “Calm down! I’m just kidding,” she turns her head away for a moment to cough, adding “mostly” without Chuck noticing. She smiles pleasantly to cover up any signs of mischievousness that might have lingered.

Herc turns around, and still looks a little surprised at Chuck. He can’t help but ask “What?”

Herc shakes his head, “Oh nothin’. Shall we?” He makes a grand gesture for everyone to enter the restaurant.   

 

Stacker mentions their morning activity, and both Mako and Chuck want to know what happened. 

“Come on, tell us, what were you up to?”

“I told you, went to a Boxing gym for a workout.”

“Were you sparring?” Mako asks of Stacker, he shakes his head no.  A thumb in Herc’s direction, and Mako looks at Hansen senior. “Well come on! Tell us!” 

“Oi, it's not a big deal. Stacks and I went to have a friendly work out. We went two rounds without really landing a hit on each other and next thing I know we got a crowd asking to teach them some of our moves.” Herc looks over to Stacker, who just shakes his head, leaving the storytelling to Herc, this time. 

Mako looks at Stacker a moment longer, there is a secret, he’s hiding something he finds amusing. But she’s not about to be rude to Sensei’s friend. She returns her attention to him. “Yeah?” Prompting him to continue.

“Well this group turns into a crowd.  They are eating up every little thing we show them, from jabs and dodges to an artfully executed roll. The owner of the place comes out, and says,” in a bad russian accent he impersonates, “Da, let us make a fun wager?” Dropping the accent he carries on, wild hand gesture following, “We think, sure we’ve got time.” Herc smiles albeit wistfully, then turns back to Mako and Chuck. “So we take Sasha up on her wager. Stacks takes on this wild hot head of a kid.  He didn’t have a chance! The kid goes down in two rounds, total KO, right?! It was great!”

“You don’t look like you have a scratch on you!” Chuck interjects, because he knows that Herc definitely does have some.

“Yeah, Stacks got the small fry idiot, without taking any real damage.” Herc runs his fingers over the cut on his cheek, “I wasn’t as lucky.  This kid I fought, he was real tough, military precision.  He played by the book, but was willing to throw that book at me when it presented itself.” Letting out a low whistle, he rolls on, “The tall guy, was quiet and lithe, built for speed, but he hit pretty hard too.  I actually landed a few hits on him, low, but he kept all the crucial spots covered.  

We danced around some before exchanging blows. He let loose a barrage of punches, I took a couple hits in my blocking efforts. We ended up dancing around so long that Sasha called it.  I commended the kid for giving an old man such a good time!” Laughing at his own joke of sorts.

Mako takes the pause to ask “Wait, Sasha? As in Kaidanovsky? As in you were at Cherno Alpha Gym?”

Stackers nods, “Yes, and you might know the man that fought with Hercules.”

Mako doesn’t look surprised, more skeptical at what he is leading them towards. “Me? Or Chuck?”

Stacker pauses, looks first Mako then Chuck, “Both.” 

Mako and Chuck are surprised, and let is show on their faces. In unison they ask “Who?”

Herc, recovered from his own humor, looks to Stacker, who nods his head again. “What was it? Oh it was a B name, ugh wait don’t tell me… I fought him I can remember… Ah right, Becket! It was R Becket.”

All the color drains from Chuck’s face. _My dad just had a boxing match with my would-be-boyfriend. I need a moment._

 

Chuck excuses himself to the bathroom.  Herc looks a little confused, and Mako looks a little stricken.  Stacker’s face changes to one of concern.  Chuck can’t stay at the table for this, he needs a moment to collect himself.  Numbly finding his way to the bathroom, Chuck is clearing his mind while washing his hands when his old man comes in. Starts washing his hand next to Chuck.

He looks up at his dad, an expression Chuck knows on his dad’s face, the ‘what are you doin’ wit your life?’ Face. Chuck rolls his eyes, but takes the bait anyway, better to have it out here instead of in front of Mako and Stacker. “Just say it dad, whatever it is.”

“Huh? Oh well I, uh…” His dad suddenly seems tongue tied, that's unusual. Then he clears his throat, straightens his shoulders and looks Chuck in the eyes. “What did I do this time?”

“What?! No, you, ugh, I, uh You’re fine dad.” Chuck tries to cover up his unease. 

“You okay son?”

“Huh, Oh yeah, I’m fine.”

“You sure? You can talk to me, you know that right?”

Chuck blinks once, twice, eyes going wider each time.”Yeah, yeah Old Man, I’m fine, can we not have an awkward coming of age conversation in the bathroom of a restaurant?” Chuck blushes and looks away, he fiddles with the paper towel in his hands. Herc looks back down at his hands to finish washing them. “Dad, lets get back, huh?”

Herc smiles at Chuck, but it sets off warning bells in his head. “You know, I’m a little surprised.”

Chuck can’t help it, he takes the bait. “By what dad?”

“That you’re brought Mako to our little double date.”

“Wait? What?! You think…?! Date? Oh my God, You are unbelievable old Man!”

“Stop calling me old.”

“Whatever, we’re not having this conversation here.”

“Well it looks like we are.”

“No, we’re not.  You want to talk about all this sure. We’ll have it out, but not here, and definitely not NOW.” Chuck throws the paper into the trash and exits before Herc can rebuttal anything.

 

Back at the table Mako perks up when Chuck approaches the table. Then a serious look crosses her face, “what’s wrong?” She whispers to him once he’s seated again.

“Nothings wrong, why?”

“You’re two shades redder than when you left the table, and there seems to be a blood vessel ready to pop in your temple is all.” She waves her hand to take the sting out of the statement.

“Ugh,” chuck exhales slowly, thinking cool and calming thoughts, forcing the blood flow to his face to return to normal. “Its nothing really.”

“It doesn’t look like nothing!”

“Don’t worry about it Mako. I’m just going to have an extended conversation with my dad  _ later _ .”

* * *

 

Next morning Chuck is up early.  Ready for a call with Raleigh.  He’s sitting in baggy sweats, lounging in the common of his dorm.  He’s got his phone next to him, but he’s expecting the call to be on skype.  Just as he finishes a bowl of cereal, he goes to put the dish away when he hears a knock on the suite door. He looks over and his other roommate is sitting on the couch watching TV. 

“I’ll get it.” He responds without a second thought.

Wiping his hands quickly, he opens the door assuming it's someone for his roomate. He blinks when he comes face to face with a pair of fair blue, almost grey, eyes.  Chuck’s gaze slides up to see a slightly shaggy blonde mop of hair. He blinks again, running from head down to toes, _it is unmistakable. Raleigh-GOD-DAMN-Becket  is standing in his dorm, staring at him like this is totally normal!_

“Who is it?” Chuck hears from the common room.  Chuck snaps out of his trance, shakes his head and steps back from the door to let his roommate see who it is for himself, words failing Chuck. “Ah, you gonna come in? Or you going to make him stand there all day Chuck?” 

“Oh, uh yeah, Right. Come in.” Chuck gestures for Raleigh to come in, he bows his head slightly before stepping into the suite.  Observing his guest, he notes that despite the warm weather Rals is wearing a long sleeve t-shirt, with a crew neck that is well fitted to his form.  Noting the relaxed jeans that cling to Raleigh’s better assets.  Averting his gaze Chuck closes the door, freezing with his hand still on the knob.   

Someone clears their throat, Chuck realizes he’s still standing with his back to Raleigh and his roommate. He takes a deep breath, calm thoughts before facing him again.  _ I was not just ogling him, no, not me. _ The blush doesn’t fully dissipate despite his breathing deeply.

Turning around he recovers mostly, stammering out “Hey, uh want to, ah.  Talk?”

“Yea, but I thought we might talk somewhere…”

Cutting off whatever he was about to follow that up with, Chuck grabs Raleigh’s wrist, whisking him out of the common area to the door of his room. Swiftly opening it and pulling them both inside before he releases Raleigh’s hand.  Raleigh looks as stunned as Chuck feels. His heart is racing, his hand feels warmer where he touched the other man’s skin.  Chuck rubs the back of his neck, looking away from Raleigh’s face.  

“Sorry, I just uh… “  _ just what? Didn’t want to have a personal conversation in front of my suitemate? Wanted to yell at you? I’m just a hot mess?  _ Chuck can’t seem to voice anything properly, or think of anything for that matter.

Looking away as well Raleigh saves Chuck from his own mind. “I’m the one that owes you and apology.  Sorry I didn’t come to see you sooner.” He pauses, looking up at Chuck, but Chuck can’t make eye contact yet, his blush still coloring his cheeks. 

Raleigh sighs heavily when Chuck doesn’t respond.  “Look, I don’t have any excuses for my behaviour, but Yancy over stepped his bounds.  He spoke about matters...” He looks away again, Chuck looks up then.  

He waits, Raleigh is preparing to say something more. Anxiety rolls around in Chuck,  _ what? Just say it man!  _ But he doesn’t want to interrupt afraid it will set him back to not talking. That scares Chuck even more than whatever he has to say. He watches Becket, his throat is working, his adams apple bobbing up and down, but no words come out.  Chuck has an image of himself right after his mom died. He doesn’t want to be alone, but he can’t speak up…  _ maybe Rals is going through something similar?  _

“How about we take a walk?” The words spill out of Chuck before he knows what to do about it. 

Raleigh’s shoulders relax slightly, he nods. Chuck give himself a once over, realized he’s not really dressed to be outside. “Wait here a moment, I’ll change.”

Chuck grabs some clothes hastily from his dresser, rushes past Raleigh, standing in his room still.  A blank look on his features, eyes cast to the floor again. Chuck doesn’t linger on it now,  _ have to get dressed to get out of the dorm, get moving, that should help Raleigh relax.  He seems so tense _ , standing in Chuck’s room. 

Throwing his discarded clothes into the bin, he shoves his keys and wallet into his pocket of his jeans.  Despite wanting to grab Raleigh’s hand again, he keeps his hands to himself, and makes gestures to move. Impatience taking hold, he quickly closes the door behind them, and locks it, waves at his roommate on the way out.  Raleigh keeping pace now, following on his heels.  

They walk in silence out of the building, neither saying where they are going.  They seem to navigate on autopilot.  The sun beating down warming Chuck’s back through his t-shirt. He wonders,  _ how does Raleigh stand being covered up like that?  _

“Iee Otenki desu, ne?”

“What?!” Chuck whirls around at the sound of Raleigh’s voice.  The one word coming out much harsher than he anticipated, he recoils from himself.  “Uh, sorry, what’d you say?”

Raleigh looks surprised, “Oh, uh nice weather huh?”

“Oh.” He looks up at the sun, wishes he brought his sunglasses, its going to be another hot day. “Yea I suppose it is.”

Suddenly Raleigh stops next to him, Chuck looks up at the awning in front of them, its the cafe they used to frequent together.  Raleigh grabs the door and holds it open, Chuck figures its as good as any place to get this over with. At least this place is familiar.

Chuck goes straight to their usual spot in the back, while Raleigh goes to the counter to order. Chuck didn’t tell him what he wanted, guess it’ll be good to see what he comes up with.

Becket sits down in the plush seat across from Chuck, he leans forward, elbows on knees, hands fidgeting with nothing.  “I’m sorry Hansen.”

“Call me Chuck. We’re not soldiers, call me by first name.” Chuck’s tone still very neutral, some of the bitterness keeping him from letting Raleigh go at his own pace.  

“Uh, right... Chuck. I know you talked to Yan.  And while I am mad as hell at him, I owe you an apology.” 

Chuck’s forgiving and understanding side surfaces, “For what?”

Raleigh looks up sharply, making eye contact for this first time since knocking on the door. “I...” but he is cut off by the Barista arriving with their drinks.  Raleigh sits back in his chair, giving them ample room to drop off one hot drink and one cold drink.  

Chuck inspects the item Raleigh ordered for him, sips the cold frothy drink. It's a iced mocha, not too sweet either, Chuck’s favorite tailored just how he likes it. He smiles into his drink, this is the best coffee shop. Then he stops, realizes it’s not the Barista that remembered, he hasn’t been here since Raleigh left, and none of the people behind the counter look familiar. Raleigh must have remembered, and asked specifically. 

Chuck cuts anything Raleigh was about to say. “Listen to me Raleigh. You went through some shit. I get it. I really do.” He pauses, remembering adjusting to life without his mom around, his dad was just as broken up about it. So yeah, he understands that life is full of lemons. He remembers what Mako said, ‘there’s probably a reason he’s been avoiding you.’ “You don’t have to explain everything to me, or anyone.  But if you want to pick up things with me you’re going to have to put in some effort.”

 

Unexpectedly Raleigh stands up, leans his hand on Chuck's Chair, Chuck leans back in the chair. Swiftly in one motion Raleigh’s free hand grabs Chuck by the back of the neck, and forces his chin up, his face met with Raleigh’s.  The warmth of Raleigh’s mouth on Chuck's short circuits his brain. Raleigh’s teeth nip at Chuck’s lower lip, Chuck opens up to them, a hot tongue caressing his lip before going further. Just as Chuck forgets everything else his hand comes up to find the shaggy hair at the nape of Raleigh’s neck.  Forcing the contact to continue. Chuck savors the sweetness of the tea flavor, contrasted to the bitterness in the flavor of his own drink. 

 

Then it is gone. Chuck opens his eyes, didn’t realize he’d closed them in the first place. 

“You interested?”

“What?” CHuck’s brain doesn’t follow. 

Raleigh sits back down.  “In trying to be more than just friends?” 

“Wow. Talk about impetuous.” Chuck blinks again.  _ Well today has turned out totally different than I imagined it would. _

“Well…” Raleigh looks away, a blush running down his neck. 

“Oh no, don’t try to backpedal from there Mister! I didn’t say  _ no _ , I just can’t believe how things like to turn out.” He grabs his cool drink, sips it to cool off some. Licking his lips, he notices Raleigh’s attention focused on his mouth.  His voice dipping down dangerously, “Well I won’t deny I liked it.” He raises one eyebrow, a hint of mischief playing across his features. “But you’re not off the hook for avoiding me.” Smug smile curling on his lips.

Sitting in stunned silence for a moment Raleigh clears his throat.  “I know. But it… it hurt too much to see you, and hear you.” He looks down into his drink.  

Chuck curses himself for creating the somber feeling in the other man.  Quickly searching his brain for a way to pull him out of it he snatches onto the thought from last night. “Oh, on another note, you want to come to lunch with me and my dad?”

“Your dad?!” 

“Yeah, you actually met him already.”

“I did?!” Raleigh looks skeptical now. 

“Yeah, at the gym.  You Box at Cherno Alpha gym right?”

“How’d you know?”

Waving his hand to dismiss that for now, Chuck rolls on, “Nevermind that now. But You sparred with an older guy, kinda looks like me, has a loud hearty laugh?” Chuck watches as all the blood seems to drain from Raleigh’s face. “OH don’t worry about it. He seemed to have a good time of it, you put up a good fight. No hard feelings, so stop looking like a ghost.”

“I had no idea who he was! I’m so sorry.” Some of Raleigh’s old self coming back as they continued to talk.  

“Don’t worry about it. He was rather impressed actually…. But since you’ve already met I thought it might not hurt to meet under more…uh,  _ civil terms _ .” Raleigh looks a little doubtful of Chuck’s intentions. Chuck exhales, Makes another waving hand motion,  “Don’t overthink it, it’d be just as a friend. Not going to put you on the spot and call you my boyfriend or anything…”

“Oh. Well then… sure?” 

“Great! And if that goes well, I might consider forgiving you for whatever the hell was going on.” Chuck relaxes, places his cup down once more. Unable to wait till later, he tests this, thing they have going on. Quickly to avoid losing his nerve Chuck stands up, leans into Raleigh’s space and lets his lips find Raleigh’s.  Placing several little kisses on his lips, and nose, he brings his hand up to grab Raleigh’s chin, forcing his face up to meet Chuck’s.  

 

Making eye contact he closes his eyes, and places a sweet and tender kiss to Raleigh’s lips.  His lips parting slightly to tentatively taste the older man’s lips with a swipe of his tongue.  Surprisingly Becket makes a small noise in his throat, and suddenly opens his mouth more, bringing Chuck even closer and suddenly they are sharing tastes again. 

Chuck feeling the hard straight line of teeth, as well as the smooth heat of Raleigh’s tongue.  Raleigh adds a little pressure, drawing all the breathe out of Chuck until he is forced to break contact to breath. 

Chuck pulls away opens his eyes, to meet Raleigh’s, which are wide and dilated.  Raleigh sweeps his tongue over his lips one more time, bringing Chuck’s attention from his eyes down to that sweet mouth, doing strange things to his insides, a coil in the pit of his stomach churning up.  Desire and love swell inside him for this man, that with just one kiss has once again turned things on his head.  

 

Clearing his throat Chuck steps back, then sits back down quickly.   _ Yup, today is going to be much better than expected. _


	4. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kissing in a Coffee shop, and the baristas telling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a little bit of fluff that came to me today. I thought this story was over, but then this. Hope you enjoy.  
> Please Review, Kudos and Comment.

Raleigh and Chuck continue to frequent the cafe.  

They meet there one weekend early, Raleigh freshly showered after his run.  Chuck still sleep rumpled, but dressed to be presentable.  The barista behind the counter smiles at Raleigh. He smiles back, eyes dart over to watch Chuck shuffle over to the usual corner.  

“What can I get you?”

Raleigh snaps his gaze back to the barista. “Uh, yea. Can I get a Nonfat Matcha Latte, and a” he scans the board, a quick glance to Chuck. He’s slumped into the over sized chair, “A double shot mocha, with the cocoa powder and whip cream. Please.” He smiles brightly.

“Sure thing. A double shot you said?”

“Yup, with whip cream.” he nods.

“And a name for the order?”

“Becket.” he nods.

“Alright, that all?”

“Yes.” he hands her his credit card along with his frequent sipping card.

“Ah, thank you.” she hands both cards back and smiles with an suspicious up-tick to the corner of her lip.

He assumes he imagined that, and walks back to join Chuck. He places a soft kiss to Chuck’s temple before he sits down.  That gets a little more wakefulness into Chuck.

“Oi, don’t be adorable when I’m not awake to appreciate it.” he grumbles. “Who’s idea was it to be up this early?”

“Excuse me. I offered to meet you later, but you insisted to see me.”

“Ugh, my former self was a dick to my current self.”

“Hahaa,” Raleigh shakes his head at Chuck, “Sounds like a double shot may not be enough to wake you up.”

“Double?” Chuck is interrupted when the Barista comes over to drop off the drinks on the table.

"Excuse me," she smiles at them "Mocha?"

“Oh, thank God!” he grabs for the hot drink from the Barista as she offers it up.

"Matcha?"

"Yup that's me." Raleigh smiles, “Thanks” to the Barista.

“No problem.” she smirks and Raleigh wonders what that is about.

* * *

 

Raleigh drops into the cafe one night after class and grabs some to go drinks. He’s the only one at the counter and they hand over the cups quickly. He drops the four drinks into a carrier and heads to the library.  He waves as he leaves the cafe, the barista smiling at him, with that funny quirk again. He forgets about it as the cold air hits him.  

He gets back to the library in good time. Chuck, Mako and Yancy all sitting at a table together.  He raises the drinks as excuse for his tardiness.  

Chuck smiles, “Oh thank god! I’d never stay awake without some chemical help.”

Mako smirks at him, “Like Raleigh’d ever forget to get _your_ drink.”

“You never know. He’s done crazier things.” Yancy adds without looking up from his note.

“Calm down kids, I got something for everyone.” He quickly scans the check boxes on the lids and puts the drinks in front of each intended recipient. He sits down and starts to pull books out.

Mako snorts, then is reaching for Yancy’s drink. Then she nods to Chuck, “What does yours say?”

“What? It’s a mocha, why?”

“No, not what is the drink, _what_ _does it say_?”

“Oi, What’re you on about Mako?”

Yancy snorts next, that gets Raleigh’s attention. “What?”

“Did you read the sides of the cups Rals?” Yancy points at his drink.

“Not really….” the barista’s smirk coming to mind again, a feeling of dread like cold water hits him “why?”

“What does yours say?” Yancy asks.

Raleigh picks his drink up to eye level, turns it 180 degrees and his face drops, “Oh god.”

“What is it?” Chuck is looking annoyed.

Raleigh blushes, “Mr. good kisser”

“What?!” Chuck then turns his around, and he turns bright pink too.

“What does it say?” Mako is looking put out now.

Yancy leans over and reads it, smiling brightly, “Cuddly bun”

Raleigh covers his face. Mutters through his hands, “What did they put on yours?”

“Cuddly buns other hun” Mako chirps.

“I am not.. bah! Ugh," more muttered curses. He turns, glaring at Yancy, "And yours?” Chuck sounds accusatory.

“Low Maintenance- boring coffee.” Yancy smiles, shrugs, “Guess they didn’t know it was for ‘Mr. Good kisser’s’ brother’. Heheh”

“Oh, I’m never going to live that kiss down, am I?” Raleigh moans.

Yancy smiles, “Not any time soon, if your barista has anything to do with it.” He sips his drink with a smug grin.

Raleigh rolls his eyes at Yancy, spreads his books out on the table. “Whatever, I think good kisser is a compliment.”

Mako nods, “there are worse things to be called.” she stares at Chuck pointedly.

He turns several more shades of red. He barely makes eye contact with anyone the rest of the night.

 

* * *

 

"What is this about Chuck being cuddly?" Newt asks on skype one night.

Chuck rolls his eyes hard. "I'm not cuddly, ya wanker!"

"I would beg to differ." Raleigh pipes up from his spot on the couch of Chuck's dorm.

"You, stay out of this!" he points angrily at Raleigh. "Its a misunderstanding from a coffee shop. Its not even real news or anything. Huff, and I'm not cuddly."

"You tryin to convince me or yourself?" Newt smiles, not swayed by Chuck's bravado.

"He's a Cuddly bun!" Raleigh chimes in.

"Oi! What'd I say? Stay out of it!" Chuck scowls in his direction. Raleigh puts his hands up in surrender.

"Cuddly bun? Huh? I have to hear the whole story for this, or I'm telling everyone you know from Sydney!"

"What?!" comes out as an indignant squawk.

**Author's Note:**

> I feel I might have rushed the ending, and or tried to add too much but not sure it was successful...? Any feedback? You liked it, You hated it, you wanted more fluff, random thoughts. Thank You!


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